Top 6 AFFL teams Ranked by Keepers

They say the early bird gets the worm. In the case of fantasy football, sometimes that worm came out a year early.

Each new league year, AFFL teams are allowed to keep two players from last season's roster in exchange for draft picks in various rounds for the upcoming year.  Planning ahead, managers could have a significant advantage over the field if they chose the players whom have high upside and cost low draft picks. Having a keeper in the 5th round that is actually worth a 1st round grade like David Johnson (applause for HBK) is the makings of an indestructible team on paper.

Of course, there is no guarantee that any player kept will pan out, and many times there have been players who looked to be of great value on paper (Zac Stacy, Joseph Randle) who weren't even worth their weight in salt.

That said, this years AFFL keeper deadline brought about some interesting decisions and created a few "super cores" that will be difficult for managers around the league to overcome.

Below are the top 5 teams ranked by their keepers, their relative draft cost, and the player itself. (sorry Cobra Kai and Jaj Cousteau, no keepers means you weren't included.)

6. BDiddy

Keepers: Tom Brady (7th) Amari Cooper (3rd)

Draft pick spot: 4 of 12

Possible four: Brady, Cooper, Elliot, Cj Anderson

The Diddy did the right thing last season, salvaging a poor 2015 by drafting Amari Cooper and trading for Tom Brady. At the time, there was significant risk with taking Cooper in the 4th round, a rookie on a team with a young erratic quarterback. A year later, the move has paid off, giving Diddy a top 24 player for a late 3rd round price. Add to that a late season trade for Tom Brady who will cost a mere 7th round pick, and B meister begins the season with a strong QB/WR tandem. They had the option to keep Brandon Cooks for a 2nd round pick (at 15th overall) but opted instead to wait out Brady's suspension.

Armed with two early round picks before giving up their 3rd for Cooper, Diddy is in position to draft a solid RB/WR or double up on RB's. Adding an Ezekiel Elliot and Cj Anderson for example will give the squad a solid core to build off in the later rounds.

5. Awesomeness

Keepers: AP (1st) Deandre Hopkins (3rd)

Draft pick spot: 10 of 12

Possible four: AP, Hopkins, Aaron Rodgers, Arian Foster

Awesomeness wound up finishing 3rd last season and himself entering the 2016 season comfortably with two top tier players in AP and Hopkins. Adrian Peterson may be advanced in age, but he has hardly slowed down in his production. Still a true workhorse RB1, AP is a good, not great value at the 10th overall pick. Where Awesomeness really did well is keeping Hopkins for a 3rd rounder. A top 5 overall talent, Hopkins has the potential to end up the years best WR. Getting him in the 3rd is exceptional.

With two players at the key positions locked down, the Awesome one has the ability to go against the grain if he so chooses and solidify top talent at other positions. Nabbing Rodgers in the 2nd round (or Wilson) along with an upside but risky RB like Foster later in the 4th would give Awesomeness a strong start to building a very formidable roster.

4. Grabbers United

Keepers: Cam Newton (7th) Brandon Marshall (4th)

Draft pick spot: 9 of 12

Possible four: Cam Newton, Brandon Marshall, Jamaal Charles, Carlos Hyde

We must give it up to Grabbers. He's done a masterful job the last few years being calculating in what he does. The proof is in the keepers. The projected number 1 QB for a 7th round pick is exceptional value. Marshall is also a top 15 player that merely costs a 4th round pick. Well done. With these two players and 3 picks available before having to sit out in the early rounds, Grabbers has the makings of a championship contender. 

With a first round pick still open, Grabbers can go in many directions, but the keeper selections say he'll go RB. Jamaal Charles carries some risk, but there is much reward in getting him that late. Carlos Hyde can also be nabbed in the 2nd round to form a strong RB core and compliment the two keepers nicely.

3. Atomic Bomba

Keepers: Devonta Freeman (6th) Jordy Nelson (8th)

Draft pick spot: 8 of 12

Possible Four: Dez Bryant, Jordy Nelson, Devonta Freeman, Doug Baldiwin

With two top 20 players kept in the 6th and 8th rounds, the Bomba enters the 2016 season with an exceptional start. Freeman finished last season as the RB1 overall, and while the numbers may drop off in the upcoming year, there is little doubt that he should out play his 6th round tag barring health. With his pass catching ability, Freeman offers a safe bet for a high floor, giving the Bomba plenty of room to be risky.

Nelson is a question mark coming off an injury plagued 2015 season. However, should he return to his 2014 form where he caught over 90 balls and scored 13 tds, the 8th round value may be the best in the league.

With 5 early round picks, the Atomic one can elect to go WR/RB or any position of his choosing. A WR like Dez wouldn't be bad at all, and electing to grab an upside WR1 like Baldwin in the 2nd would give the squad a great core of talent and value.

2. Hartan

Keepers: Todd Gurley (3rd), Odell Beckham (4th)

Draft pick spot: 12 of 12

Possible Four: Gurley, Charles, Beckham Jr, Luck

Sometimes life is not fair. I bring you the Hartan. Last years champs enter the 2016 season with two top 5 players AND their two first picks still intact. Wow. Taking a huge risk in drafting Gurley last season as their number 2 RB despite the injury concern, Hartan has the Rams stud at a 3rd round value this year. That is an amazing pull. Couple that with the second season of keeping Odell Beckham with a 4th round price tag, and this team is the preseason prohibitive favorite to repeat as champion. 

With Gurley and ODBJ locked down, Hartan can grab the best player available at any position. If draft history is any guide, he will like to grab a top tier Rb along with a top QB. Jamaal Charles and Gurley would make a fine tandem, and Andrew Luck would give the team a top scoring QB that should finish the year in the top 6. Things are looking bright for the "tahn."

1. HBK Shant Michaels

Keepers: David Johnson (5th) Matt Jones (8th)

Draft pick spot: 6 of 12

Possible Four: David Johnson, Matt Jones, Aj Green, Eddie Lacy

Heading into Monday's draft, no team has a better set up than HBK when it comes to keepers. David Johnson is the consensus #1 RB and at a 5th round price tag, the best player to value bargain in the league. Matt Jones carries much upside going into the 2016 season and despite a slight nick-up in his first preseason action on Friday, he has the potential of RB1. Many questioned the Jones keeper selection, and HBK may have been a victim of his own loyalty to the Redskin Rb being that he kept him all last year for this purpose. Lamar Miller could have been had for a 3rd round pick and may have been the better choice. None-the-less, Jones should out perform his 8th round value barring health

Drafting from the 6th spot in the draft order gives HBK the chance to nab a few high quality players. Aj Green would give the team the WR1 they need to go along with DJ, and should Lacy be there in the second, we think that HBK will cover his butt at the 2nd RB position and take him. If that happens, that would be a great start for the famed Michaels.

Gurley to Hartan: "I want to Sweep the Leg." Demands Trade to Cobra Kai

Looks like Todd Gurley is no fan of Mr. Miyagi. 

After leading team Hartan to the AFFL title in 2015, Gurley asked Monday to be traded to Cobra kai, a move that has caught the champs off guard. 

"We really don't know where this is coming from," said Vartan. "I think he was just watching Karate kid and had a moment of nostalgia. We're not planning on trading him. "

Hartan typically doesn't address player trades in public, and it would be surprising if a move of this type were made on or before AFFL draft day. Still, if their star player is unhappy in his current "dojo," the chances of a back-to-back title.

Gurley, the 2015 third round pick, is the foundation of team Hartan, along with Odell Beckham Jr, forming a very deadly WR/RB combo. He is a highly coveted player,on that any manager would want to have on their team, and nobody has been pressing the issue like Cobra Kai owner Sayyad. He's been in Hartan's ear since tax season, preparing a "Godfather" type trade offer that only the "dumb would refuse." It seems that Sayyad has found a way to reach Gurley.

Sources claim that Sayyad had dinner with Gurley early last week at Carousel restaurant. Restaurant patrons that night remembered Gurley being given multiple helpings of dolma, fatoush salad and plenty of"tahn" to drink. Sources also claim that Sayyad presented Gurley with Cobra Kai themed backgammon set and bottle of cognac from Armenia.

"Leave nothing past Cobra," said one AFFL manager who wished to remain anonymous, "he has the ability to make impossible trades happen, like my partner Avo does."

Still the question remains, if Gurley were indeed traded to Cobra Kai, what could he offer? Cobra's keepers are caca, and unless he plans on completely mortgaging his draft, we don't see how Jay ajayi and any combination of picks could be satisfying.

Despite that, a picture released by Cobra kai on early Tuesday morning showed just how confident that Gurley will be on the team. Dressing up the smallest co-manager in the league in Gurley gear, Sayyad put the "cart before the horse,"  doubling down on a future trade. Bold.

The picture caught the attention of Harout who wasn't pleased.

"It was cute. I hope he bought little tiny kiddie cleats too. When it comes to joke moves by joke managers, Sayyad is the head of the class. The only way he can have Gurley on his team is photo shopping his picture into his joke logo."

Sayyad was unavailable for comment, but released a statement stating that he intends to show "no mercy" in trade negotiations this week, and "if you think Gurley won't be on my team this year, siktir."

Siktir indeed. We'll see just who will be siktiring in the weeks ahead.

"Asdvadz Mer hede"! DId Pope help Vosgereechee Gyank win AFFL Draft Lottery?

Pope Francis rocking Vosgee logo to "Gyank Nation" fans outside the Vatican

After suffering through a difficult 2015 season, Vosgee Gyank owner Mardig Kasbarian final finished first in something, the 2016 AFFL Draft Lottery. With a total of seven lottery balls in the hopper, and the best odds in the group, Vosgee edged out Prime Time and Magnum Sev.i and will select first in this years AFFL Draft.

"It feels great to win," said an enthusiastic Kasbarian. "We're going to take things up a notch this year. Maybe two notches. We'll see. I have to clear that with the wife, but we'll see.

Taking it up a notch or two would be welcomed, as Gyank Nation and its fans have yet to reap any fruits of their years of dedication, having made the playoffs only once in the past eight years.  It is the longest current playoff drought in the league, one that eats away at Kasbarian every year.  Will 2016 be the season when he finally gets the "mamoon" off his back? With the amount of support Vosgee is receiving from big time players, it very well could be.

Mardig unveils "Flamingo Gyank," his new good luck shirt.

Pope Francis was seen holding up a Vosgee Gyank logo to a crowd of supporters outside the Vatican earlier this week. Rumors had been swirling for months that the Pope was a secret AFFL follower and now we have the proof.. A long time fan of the Gyank, the Pope has given "his blessing" to every one he drafts, his two potential keepers of Allen Robinson and CJ Anderson, and said, "May all the fantasy luck be in the Vosgee hoooouse."

Kasbarian himself has also put forth a concerted effort to change the tide of years past, unleashing a new lucky "flamingo shirt" to wear on Sundays. He claims that the shirt actually helped him win the lottery and he has embodied the spirit of a flamingo to draft the right players. Why you may ask? Well let Kasbarian explain.

"Flamingos are not endangered; they are classified as 'least concern,' did you know that? They also steal nests that are already built, bro. That's what Gyank is all about. I'm the least of any managers concern, but I'm gonna snatch a title right out from under the league."

Will this flamingo fly, or will he be another ornament that gets set out on the AFFL lawn? With the first pick in the draft this year, the blessings of the Pope, and the power of the Flamingo, Vosgee is set for his most successful season yet... that is until he isn't.

Here is the complete AFFL Draft order that will take place Aug. 25th along with the Draft Video below.

1. Vosgee Gyank (Mardig)
2. Prime Time (Ara)
3. Magnum Sev.i (Sevag and Danny)
4. BDiddy (Baret, Mike P, Tiggy)
5. Hangin' & Bangin' (Dre and Avo)
6. HBK Shant Michaels (Shant A)
7. Cobra Kai (Sayyad)
8. Atomic Bomba (Raffi)
9. Jaj Cousteau (Chris)
10. Awesomeness VII (David)
11. Grabbers United (Sassoon)
12. Hartan (Harout & Vartan)

No More Asterisk: Hartan wins 2015 AFFL Title!

After talking more trash than Waste Management all season long, team Hartan backed it up by winning their first 12 team AFFL title, defeating Grabbers in the final by a score of 131.70-112.48. In so doing, they become the third franchise to have two titles to their name, joining Atomic Bomba and Awesomeness. They are the first Co-managed Champion of the modern AFFL era. It was a title that was much needed, as the first championship of the squad was during the 10 team year of the AFFL. Everyone refused to recognize that championship as legitimate and called team Hartan a pretend champion for years. They can do so no longer, as the 2015 title legitimizes the team and puts them in AFFL lore.

Grabbers reached the finals for the second time in four seasons, and shouldn't hang their head. The ultra competitive league doesn't have much wiggle room for error, and Grabbers managed the season flawlessly. In so doing, they have elevated their status among all teams, and are creeping closer to becoming one of the elite franchises in the league.

In honor of our champs, and in true AFFL fashion, we present to you the Champions Slideshow commemorating the teams victory. Congratulations to Hartan. 2015 AFFL Champs.

2015 AFFL Yearly Awards

Alas, all things must come to an end, and sadly, the 2015 AFFL season will draw to a close this weekend. There shall be one champion come the conclusion of week 16, but since this is Christmas, more awards need to be given out. Presenting the 2015 AFFL awards as voted on by the esteemed panel of 7 AFFL judges who shall remain anonymous. These awards have been sponsored and include a wide range of prestigious categories. While not everyone will win an award, the ones that do can take pride in knowing that event though their season may have fallen apart they did something right along the way. Keep your chins up lads, there is always next year.

Below is the list of recipients of the awards, the final vote among AFFL judges, and the rationale submitted by the judging panel. Congratulations to the winners.

Soul-Glo's Best Pick of the Draft Award

Winner: Atomic Bomba - Devonta Freeman (9th round)

Runner-up: Hartan - Todd Gurley (4th round)

Judges: 6-1 in favor of Bomba

This one was fairly easy to call, as the Bomba drafted the current #1 RB in fantasy in the 9th round. Todd Gurley was an exceptional pick by Hartan, as they risked a player off injury that high. Gurley currently is the 3rd highest RB in fantasy. Close to Freeman, but given the 5 round value, the edge goes to the Falcons running back and the Atomic Bomba

Schick's Close Shave Victory of the Year

Winner: Atomic Bomba

.52 victory over Vosgee Gyank week 13

Runner-up: Grabbers United

.9 victory over BDiddy week 6

Judges: 7-0 in favor of Bomba

With the season on the line, the Atomic Bomba needed 5 points from Dez Bryant in order to make the playoffs. He got those points over the last six minutes of the game, and won the playoff spot on the last two passes of the game to Dez Bryant.  Considering the implications of the match and how it ended, it doesn't get closer than that.  Grabbers is currently in the championship game, but their narrow victory would not have effected that. Had they lost, they still would have made the playoffs and with the point totals, advanced.

The Yankee Candle Co. Blow-out of the Year

Winner: Jaj Cousteau - 82 pts week 10

Runner-up: Hartan - 77 pts week 3

Judges: 7-0

When Jaj blows his wad, he really blows his wad. An 82 point victory over the Atomic Bomba in week 10 was the biggest margin of victory by a team this year. Hartan came close with a 77 point thumping of Prime Time in week 3. Nothing is worse than losing, only when you get absolutely destroyed. Kudos for Jaj for making it an ass-kicking.

Toyota Truck's Best Waiver Pick-up

Winner: Awesomeness - Jordan Reed

Runner-up: Jaj Cousteau - Javarious Allen

Judges: 4-3 in favor of Awesomeness

This was a close one. Both pick-ups were instrumental in the success of the the teams. Jaj did a masterful job picking up Allen just before Justin Forsett got hurt and got mass production from him for three weeks. However, the edge goes to Awesomeness as the pick of Reed occurred week 1 and Reed currently resides as the 5th best TE in fantasy. Oh, and he's been the top TE over the last month.

The Joe's Trade of the Year

Winner: Grabbers United - Gronkowski/Winston for Cam Newton/Greg Olsen

Runner-up: HBK Shant Michaels - Gore/Martin/Aiken/Jeffery/Peyton for Brees/Miller/Jordan Matthews/Barnidge/Andrews

Judges: 4-3 in favor of Grabbers

Another close call. HBK did a masterful job resurrecting his team from the depths of a horrible season. On the brink of a lost season at 1-5, Shant pulled off a masterful trade, getting players while at a "buy low" state. The team won six of seven games to finish the season after the move, and nearly made it into the postseason. If it weren't for Cam Newton's explosion at the end of the season, HBK would be the winner. However, Grabbers won the bye and is one win away from a title thanks to Newton. That trade could win them a title, thus deserves the award.

The Boomerang Co. Comeback Manager Award

Winner: Awesomeness

Runner-up: Atomic Bomba

Judges: 7-0 in favor of Awesomeness

Fairly easy one to call. Awesomeness has finished in last place the last two seasons. Once a proud champion of the AFFL, his return to relevance in 2015 was overdue. Finishing in 3rd is still in play, and would be a masterful turn around from the previous two seasons. Bomba's rebound from a 9th place finish isn't as great, and no other team can claim the kind of turn-around as from last year to this as Awesomeness.

The Kaiser Steel Co. Toughest S.O.B in the AFFL

Winner: Cobra Kai

Runner-up: HBK Shant Michaels

Judges: 5-2 in favor of Cobra Kai

Any week you played Cobra Kai was going to be a week of work because you know he was working on the other side. Waiver pick-ups, trades, sneaky roster moves, everything was in play when the Kai came up on the schedule. No other manager made more moves than the Cobra. He was a tough out most all weeks, and a team nobody wanted to play. HBK took to off during the second half of the season and was a team that nobody wanted to face either. However, the hardest, toughest manager this year was the Cobra. Nobody out worked him.

The E-Harmony Tandem Manager of the Year

Winner: Hartan (Root and Vartan)

Runner-up: BDiddy (Baret, Mikey, Tiggy)

Judges: 6-1

A separate category for Co-managed teams is new this year, as requested by Prime Time. Of the four co-managed teams in the league, no team was working in greater harmony than Hartan. Having finished in 4th place the past three seasons, the chemistry between the pair is apparent. All roster decisions and controversies did not effect the team greatly, as they catapulted to the top of the Dolma division. BDiddy and friends did a fine job salvaging a team that was left for dead mid-season. Nonetheless, the co-managed team that is better than the other co-managed teams is indeed Hartan.

The Kellogs Smack Talker of the Year

Winner: Hartan

Runner-up: Cobra Kai

Judges: 5-2

From WWF references to the bashing of the Mazoon division, Hartan not only one the Dolma division, they took the crown when it came to smack-talk too. Whats app messages were littered with meme's and images by the hands of team two-face all season long, so much so that the league is now rooting against them. That's the kind of smack talk that you love to see. Cobra kai nearly won the award with the epic pic of Ara topless at the most appropriate time. Alas, the volume of Hulk Hogan images was just to much to overcome.

The Mountain High Team of the Year

Winner: Grabbers United

Runner-up: HBK Shant Michaels

Judges: 6-1

This one doesn't have much debate with it. Grabbers seems like a team of destiny, and perhaps the most fun team in the AFFL to root for. They waddled around for a bit in the Mazoon division, narrowly holding on to a playoff spot most of the season thanks to a favorable schedule, only to turn it on the last three weeks. With Cam Newton exploding, Sammy Watkins coming and going then coming, and a bunch of no names at RB for most of the season, this team has something for everyone. HBK had that mojo going as well, but came up just a bit short.

The Mez Dolma Manager of the Year Award

Winner:  HBK Shant Michaels

Runner-up: Grabbers United

Judges: 4-3

Let the controversy begin. How could Grabbers manager Sassoon not get the award? It isn't that he isn't deserving. Grabbers has managed to make it to the finals with a roster that would have been selected as one of the leagues worst. However, Grabbers was helped by a favorable schedule, and did begin the year on a winning streak. HBK was 1-5 and on the brink of thinking about 2016. No team had ever made the playoffs after such a start, and after a few trades and waiver pick-ups, HBK came within a few points of doing so. Because every move had to be exactly right, and darn near was, HBK gets the nod as Mez Dolma Manager of the Year.