Courier

AFFL Finalizes Draft Order for "World Leaders League." Egypt Gets First Pick.

August 21, 2014Raffi Lalazarian

Valdimir Putin gives his chief of staff a sign of approval after garnishing the fourth overall pick in the WFFL.

Commissioner Lalazarian shares a light moment with UN secretary-general Ban Ki-Moon dancing to Psy's hit "Gangnam Style."

After finishing his tour of eastern Europe and the "stan" countries, Commissioner Lalazarian held a private meeting with United Nations secretary-general Ban Ki-Moon where the two leaders approved the final draft order for the newly formed World Leaders Fantasy Football League. The order was determined using cooked dumplings, filled with a taste that represents each country drafting in the WFFL. The UN secretary's first bite was into a falafel flavored dumpling, granting Egypt the right to select at number one. Nicaragua's corn filled dumpling came in second.

President Abdel Fattah el-Sisi is elated after having a shot at Lesean McCoy.

"This is a momentous occasion for Egypt, and we want nothing better than to show the World, that our team 'Touchdown Tutankhamun' will be victorious and claim the golden prize," said Egyptian President Abdel Fattah el-Sisi. "We mean business my friend. This is not playing around. Yallah! Emshi! Number one pick."

El-Sisi would not comment on who plans on selecting with the first pick, but reporters overheard his staff members discussing the Philadelphia Eagles Offense in Arabic shortly after.

The fourteen team, half ppr, keeper league will hold its draft Monday August 25th at 7:25 pm at an undisclosed pizzeria in Italy. Topping the group of inductees are super powers such as the United States, Russia, England, and China, but will also include smaller countries like Uzbekistan, Nicaragua, and Zimbabwe. Armenia also received an automatic bid after passing a bill that would make AFFL the official fantasy league in Yerevan. Turkey did not make the cut.

Soon after the draft order was announced, countries quickly began exploring potential trade options. Reports out of Washington claim that the United States was working the phones to try and jump into the top five. Chief foreign correspondent Richard Engel said that Obama and company isn't ruling out the use of foreign aid as incentive to wheel and deal.

"The President really thinks Forte is going to have a big year, and that's not the Bears fan talking. We think he's worth the investment."

President Mugabe knows something that we apparently don't..

Meanwhile, leaked text messages between French President François Hollande and President Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe discuss a potential 2nd round and 5th round swap. Mugabe is rumored to be against any deal involving a 5th round pick, as he has already come out and said that he plans on selecting a sleeper that round "who will wake to be a giant of giants." Many think this alludes to New York Giants running back Rashad Jennings.

Countries will now begin to form their draft committees and finalize their rankings, as they look to win the most prestigious fantasy league in the world. The grand prize for the champion will a trophy made of pure gold, as well as bragging rights at all foreign meetings. Chinese President Xi Jinping reportedly got the smack talk started when he sent President Daniel Ortega of Nicaragua a whatsapp message shortly after the draft order was announced saying, "You is suck. Team ready for defeat. Beijing Life."

Here is the complete draft order.

Egypt
Nicaragua
China
Russia
France
Uzbekistan
England
United States
Armenia
Zimbabwe
Germany
Italy
Uruguay
Japan

categories WFFL
tags WFFL

Hye 5: Five Undervalued Players at the QB position

August 20, 2014Raffi Lalazarian

In two weeks time, there won't be anything more to do. All the analyzing, number crunching, agonizing, and indecision will finally cease and give way to a new thirteen week adventure where you can cuss out the TV screen, cuss out your friends, and have a great time stressing over fantasy football every Sunday. It's fantastic!

Over the next two weeks, the "Hye 5" articles will examine which players at the position we feel are undervalued according to where they are being drafted, starting with the quarterback position, then moving on to wide receiver/tight end and running back. After all, a fantasy football draft is not only about the player you pick, it's about when you can pick him. Things change all the time in fantasy, and so will players values over the next two weeks, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't start somewhere.

Quarterbacks are kings in the NFL, so you can bet they are the same in Fantasy. Experts everywhere laud that managers should wait on a quarterback, and I don't disagree with that stance. However, that doesn't mean that you should wait until the twelfth round either. When it comes to drafting a signal caller, you focus on the players skill set as well as the situation he finds himself in. Ideally, you want a pass-happy offense coupled with a quarterback with a great skill set. Does the signal caller have a stud WR to throw to? How is the receiving core? Some go so far as to look at the teams defense to determine if they will be in shootouts. I think this is a bit premature. If the Seahawks are playing the Cowboys, it doesn't matter that the Cowboys defense might be shaky. Do you really think that Romo is gonna put up huge numbers versus that defense? I didn't think so.

The above criteria is obviously why Manning, Brees, and Rodgers are the first three off the board. While they are the creme de la creme of the quarterback position, that doesn't meant there aren't more that can offer you just as much fantasy production on a given week. Here are five quarterbacks that can be had somewhere after the second round that will offer just as much of a chance for a great year at a discount value.

1. Andrew Luck

Current ADP: Mid-5th round

Rank should be: Late 3rd/Early 4th

A fifth round quarterback doesn't seem like it would be that great of value, unless you say that Luck could finish as one of the top three quarterbacks in fantasy. Yes, you heard that correctly. I think that Luck will finish in the top three, and wouldn't be surprised if he ends the year as #1. Bold statements need backup, so here's mine.

First lets consider the other players that have the same potential. Peyton Manning is obviously the favorite to land that honor, but he has a host of things against him. One, he is a year older and lost his redzone weapon in Decker. Two, Denver was trying to get Manning the record last year, and this year, with an improved defense, may opt to rest Manning a bit more in preparation for the postseason. I think Manning's numbers drop enough to make him vulnerable at the top.

Sean Peyton has already said that they are going to try to balance the offense a bit more, which means more running. Sure he'll get numbers, but the balanced attack will eat away at his upside just a tad. Secondly, if you look at Drew Brees's numbers in the second half of the season last year, you'll notice a significant drop off in production. In the final 8 games of the season including playoffs, Brees had only 3 multi-touchdown games. Brees was nicked up and that had something to do with it, but It's no coincidence that his drop off coincided with injury to Jimmy Graham as well. One nick to Graham, and his numbers could come down significantly again.

Lastly, Aaron Rodgers. I'll admit, Rodgers is in my eyes the strongest candidate to finish the year at number one, but he isn't full proof to downside either. Did we forget that Jordy Nelson is himself really injury prone, and with out James Jones and Jermichael Finely, should Nelson be out for an extended time, who becomes the redzone target?

Andrew Luck has a few things going for him that are positives when it comes to fantasy quarterbacks. Hakeem Nicks was added to the roster (yes he may be slow and old, but in the redzone he can still produce). His receiving core is fully healthy, including the return of Dwayne Allen another redzone target and rookie speedster Donte Moncrief. Looking at his numbers, he is entering his third season, a year when the majority of big signal callers had a jump in production (Brees went from years with 11 and 17 tds thrown to 27 in his 3rd year). Last season, Luck threw for 3800 yards with 23 Tds and 7 Ints, adding 377 rushing yards and 4 rush Tds. With the return of Allen, addition of Nicks, and a healthy Reggie Wayne, TY Hilton, and the rest of the bunch, it just seems unlikely that Luck's numbers will regress or stay flat. Couple that with the fact that the Colts don't have much of a running game. They won't be able to run the clock out in games and will rely on Luck more to keep the game in hand. An increase in production seems set, and I wouldn't be surprised if we see a 10 touchdown one at that. He's going as the 5th rated QB off the board, which is fine for whoever drafts him. He'll finish better than that. Bank on it.

Drafted with expectations of: 3500+ yrds, 20-25 tds, 300+ rush yrds, 5 tds.
Should finish with: 4400+ yrds, 30+ tds, 300 rush yrds 5 tds.

2. Matt Ryan

Current ADP: Late 7th Round

Rank should be: Late 5th Round

If Andrew Luck getting Wayne back from injury was a boost, then Julio Jones must be rocket fuel for Ryan. Do we forget that Matt Ryan is only one year removed from finishing in the top 5 amongst fantasy quarterbacks? Now I do admit that losing Tony G is going to take some wind out of the "good ship Ryan-pop's" sails, but that shouldn't be anything that Julio Jones can't make up for. What is more important is that the Falcons are reportedly going to operate out of a three-wide set as their base, highlighting their strong WR core and pass catching running backs. If that doesn't set the table for a big year for Ryan, I don't know what will. Having three wide receivers at his disposal, Matty Ice will have ample opportunity to return to his 2012 form despite the loss of Tony G. It's also worth noting that Steven Jackson is a year older and the falcons know this. Drafting Devonta Freeman was a move that showcased the coaching staffs desire to open up the offense and throw it around a little more. They won't be able to be affect with Steven Jackson taking the bulk of the focus.

In 2012, Matty Ice finished the year with 4700 yards passing and a 32/14 td/int ratio. There is no reason to thing that those yardage totals aren't possible with a trio like Julio, Roddy, and Douglas. Tony G had eight touchdowns that year, and I don't think it would be far fetched to say that number couldn't be split between Julio, Roddy, and Douglas. Matt Ryan is top 5 Qb potential at a late mid-round price. Call the police. This is stealing.

Drafted with expectations of: 3900+ yrds, 27 tds,
Should finish with: 4500+ yrds, 30+tds

3. Tony Romo

Current ADP: Early 9th round

Rank Should be: Mid-7th round

Stop me if you've heard this before. Tony Romo is an overrated quarterback. Please, keep saying that. It helps drive his value through the floor. So let me get this straight. I get a Qb who has a stud WR, stud TE, solid WR core, great offensive line, pass-catching solid running backs, and plays in a dome, all for a 9th round price? Did someone get fired for this? Every year seems to be the year to "defend Tony Romo," and this one seems no different. He's got a horrible stigma attached to his name that he can't shake as a real NFL quarterback, but how that has infested the fantasy universe is beyond me. There are no glaring reasons why Romo can't have as big a year as any other quarterback drafted above him, except for that little nasty stigma that he can't shake. Romo threw for 4900 yrds and 28/19 tds/ints in 2012 (finishing 8th) and 3800 31/10 last year (good for 8th again). His ceiling seems to be right around there, unless you consider a few other factors. The cowboys have had a rotation of wide receivers at the second WR spot since 2011, when Miles Austin started to fall off the map. Terrence Williams has a strong hold on that spot in 2014 and reports are he has looked good. With a more consistent core, Romo should feel more comfortable in the pocket.

But the biggest boost is perhaps the signing of Scott Linehan, the ex-Detriot Lions offensive coordinator. Compare the Cowboys personnel to the ones the lions had and you may find its very similar, if not slightly tilted in the Cowboys favor. Mega and Dez are studs. Witten is better than any tight end Stafford had. Terrence Williams should be as good if not better than Titus Young, Broyles or anyone else threw out along side Calvin. Lastly, Demarco Murray is much more of a complete back than Reggie Bush. With the glowing parts ready to use at his disposal, Linehan will give Romo the one thing that he hasn't had yet in his career, a stable, reliable, innovative play caller that he can trust. In years past, the Cowboys have passed that duty back and forth from coach to coordinator back to coach. Putting Romo at ease will lead to one of his best seasons yet.

Drafted with expectations of: 3300+ yrds, 25 tds,
Should finish with: 4800+ yrds, 30+ tds,

4. Colin Kaepernick

Current ADP: Late 9th

Rank should be: Mid-7th

When a quarterback gets a 1,000 yard receiver back to full health, and then gets another 1,000 yard receiver via trade, and adds them to a roster that has an already reliable wide out and tight end who creates mismatches, what happens? Answer: everything you can think of. The quarterback from "Tattooine" is primed for a huge year, thanks to the addition of Stevie Johnson and the return of Michael Crabtree. Kap spent most of last season throwing to guys who were third and fourth tier wide receivers. Fullback Bruce Miller was the teams third leading receiver. I think I will repeat that because that bears repeating. Bruce Miller, the stocky blocker out of the back field was the teams third leading receiver. Oh, and he's back too from injury this year. Hallelujah! It's a minor miracle that Kaepernick threw for 3100 yards and 21 tds.

On top of the loss of half his receiving core, Kaepernick played in pain, admitting that he suffered chipped bone in his foot during the week 2 game against the Seahawks. Not being able to plant your foot and throw comfortably will affect any quarterbacks trajectory and location. We can expect his 58% completion rate to rise this year as a combined result of being healed and having a full arsenal of wide outs to his disposal. The Niners didn't trade for Stevie Johnson to watch him block and stand on the sidelines. Expect Kap and co. to be in more three wide sets, looking to create one-on-one mismatches for Vernon, Crab and Stevie. Spreading the field will also allow Kap more room to roam, and I would not be the least surprised if his rushing numbers rose as a result. The Niners know this year is the year they must win it all, so I would expect them to pull out all the stops, unleashing Kaepernick in any way they can.

Drafted with expectations of: 3200+ yrds, 20 tds, 400+ rush yrds, 5 tds.
Should finish with: 3800+ yrds, 25+ tds, 500 rush yrds, 7 tds.

5. Ben Roethlisberger

Current ADP: Late 11th Round

Rank Should Be: Mid-8th Round

He's not the most flashy fantasy quarterback name on the board. He won't have many 5 touchdown games, or throw for 400 yards too often (though he did that twice last year) however, Big Ben is as reliable as they come. Finishing in the top ten in 2013, he is a late round pick that is great upside. Last season, Ben throw for more attempts than any in his career, 584. With an emphasis on running a "no-huddle" offense to maximize the number of plays run a game, those numbers should remain where they are. The Steelers have a great WR group, lead by Antonio Brown, a fast twitch player that excels in the open field. Roethlisberger also gets the addition of a developed Marcus Wheaton, who had a fine preseason game against the bills. With LeVon Bell able to catch passes out of the backfield, the Steelers are going to push tempo and put the ball in Big Ben's hands. That is a recipe for success in the fantasy world, especially when it is handed to a reliable quarterback that has a history of top five fantasy finishes.

Owners who miss-out on the above quarterbacks can look to nab Ben after the 8th round and pair him with another late Qb in hopes of playing match-ups and striking fantasy gold. While I don't expect Ben to leapfrog everyone and finish the year in the top-five, he will more than likely finish in the top ten, with a few huge games during the year that will be all the difference for a manager who invested a pick for him. Expect an improvement on last years stat line of 4200 28/14. In Todd Haley we trust.

Drafted with expectations of: 3800 yrds, 24 tds.
Should finish with: 4300+ yrds, 30+ tds,

categories Featured, Teams, Home Main
tags Atomic Bomba, Awesomeness, Hartan, Magnum Sev.i, Jaj Cousteau, Hangin', Grabbers, Cobra Kai, Vosgee Gyank, Bdiddy, Prime Time, HBK, General News

5 Things You Shouldn't Do Prior and During a Fantasy Football Draft

August 18, 2014Raffi Lalazarian

Every fantasy football website will tell you all the things you should do before your draft. They'll post rankings, podcasts, discuss players, and give you every single bit of strategy to help you succeed at picking the best team possible. There is only one problem. When it comes to the actual draft, you find that all that prep work pretty much goes out the window, as nobody in your league drafts as they are suppose to. Aaron Rodgers had been going at the end of the 2nd round in all your mock drafts, and all of a sudden he's gone at pick 13? Why did Ap go ahead of Jamaal Charles and Lesean McCoy? Why isn't anyone drafting Terrance West? What the heck is going on?!!

You'll find that a fantasy draft is more an adventure in improvisation than one in detailed preparedness. That isn't to say that you shouldn't target players and have plans, but there is a lot more that should be done, or not done, than just printing out a cheat sheet and relying on experts to tell you who to pick.

What goes without being mentioned are the many things that you should not do in a fantasy draft. No, I'm not talking about "Don't take a kicker until the last round sort of stuff," although that is part of it (and please don't). I'm talking about the actual nuts and bolts of preparing for a draft. Many managers engage in activities prior and during a draft that hinders their chances at drafting a great team. It's the little things in life that are important and sometimes not doing everything you can actually turns out to be a good thing.

So here are five bits of advice for the fantasy manager as to things they shouldn't do prior to or during a fantasy draft. The in-draft strategies are centered around snake drafting. You may not agree with them, but coming from a fantasy vet, these are things that I believe, if not done properly, will give a manager an edge come draft day.

1. Do not follow an experts advice, especially one that gets paid for it.

Get off the grid. Yes, the grid. It's the imaginary fantasy vortex that all managers live in prior to the draft. You know it well. It's made up of cheat sheets from every expert on the planet, cut together to form the total number of possibilities that every one in your league is following during the draft. Every manager in your league is more than likely following the guidelines of some expert on some website somewhere. After all, they are getting paid for their advice, they must know something right. Wrong. They know no more than you do. They watch the same preseason games and can come to the same conclusions as you. You are privy to the same information they are. Even the best experts have an accuracy percentage rate of around 57%. 57%! That's just better than a coin flip. Why bother putting your entire season in the hands of someone who is just better than a coin flip? After all, you'll hear every one of these experts say at some point, "Ya I missed that pick," as casually as possible, while you are cursing the day you drafted Cj Spiller in the first round on their advice. We've all been there.

But the biggest reason not to follow an experts advice is so that you hone your own instincts. Fantasy football is about trusting your gut. You need to know what is the best decision that YOU made, so that during the season, that little intuition that was right (or wrong) on draft day could be used again when it's time to make a roster choice. If you allow an expert to essentially pick your team for you, you're missing out on a huge opportunity to do what you feel is best and gain some valuable experience in the process. It's better to go down with choices you made, than choices someone else made for you, isn't it?

Lastly, the best thing about getting off the "grid" is that you can use it to your advantage. Why was AP taken #1 overall and Terrance West not drafted? Because someone probably followed an experts rankings to do so. Knowing this gives a huge advantage to you. You can see certain managers draft according to popular rankings from popular sites, and you can use that to your advantage. One league I was in had many of the managers using ESPN and Matthew Berry's rankings during the draft. Knowing this, I was better able to predict who would be selected when, and saw how the draft was unfolding thanks in large part to that. Needless to say, I finished second that year.

So while experts are great to listen to, and accumulate information from, do not follow anyone explicitly. In fact, discard all that information and make your own rankings up, and be keen on how other people are drafting during the draft. Use what you know against your league. All is fair in love and fantasy football.

2. Don't Stick to a Draft Plan.

Yes. That's right. Don't plan on anything. Well, okay, that may be a bit too extreme. It's always good to have a plan entering a draft, but we all know how those plans work out. The draft is fluid, and full of surprises. The teams that are able to maneuver through those surprises effortlessly are the ones that build the best teams. Just like a real NFL draft, a fantasy draft takes on a life of its own, and you have to be ready to ride the wave as it is forming.

Many managers make the mistake of having plans that they wish to carry out during draft day and stick to the plan religiously. They've mock drafted hundreds of times and determined that the best spot for them to take a second RB is rounds 4 and 5. Lo and behold, when it's their turn in the fourth round there is a wide receiver that slipped and is sitting to be taken. Never in a mock draft did the board in the 4th round have this player available. Taking him would mean altering their strategy. Instead of doing that, they pass on the player and stick to taking a running back. I've heard co-managers say "let's stick to the plan" many times. While a manager won't know the results until the end of the season, this is a situation that could comeback to haunt them.

This exact situation happened last year to my team in the AFFL, where Reggie Bush was available in the 3rd round. He had never been available in any mock draft I had done before, but there he was. The plan was to take a WR, but that quickly changed. The WR was Roddy White. Bush ended up having a huge year, while White got hurt. Had I stuck to the plan, I wouldn't have been as successful as I could of been. Be fluid. Expect to do something unexpected.

Yes you should target players, but don't be so married to your plan that you cannot deviate from it. Chances are that you will be given the opportunity to at some point in the draft, and whether or not you choose to could determine how successful you are. Mock drafts aren't the way to measure how a draft will go. They won't go that way come draft day, so be ready to throw caution into the wind and draft with reckless abandon. The draft will be more fun and chances are your team will be better for it. Which leads me to point three..

3. Do not be afraid to make a risky pick, even if you have to reach.

Why has reaching become such a bad term? Everyone says that when someone reaches for a player, it was a bad pick? Your draft board says that in the third round, Victor Cruz, Larry FItzgerald, and others are available, as usual. Experts have lauded that at this spot you should take one of the stud WRs, but your gut tells you that to pick that rookie running back that is suppose to go in round four. If you have followed the above protocol, you will have given yourself the freedom to make this move. This example was an actual example that happened in the AFFL, where HBK was faced with going with the safe pick at WR, or drafting a rookie in Eddie Lacy at the top of the 3rd round. No expert or draft strategy was promoting Lacy that early. Needless to say, Lacy turned out to be a great pick, and well worth the "reach" on investment.

The teams that are most successful minimize risk in their drafting by loading up on positions where they take the most risk. If you are contemplating taking a player that you are not sure about, you shouldn't discard taking him for that reason, but rather make sure you have enough good players around him at the same position to help offset a possible bust. Winning the fantasy football championship means that you cannot play it safe, and that means taking guys when everyone said not to. The year Arian Foster broke out, Jaj took him in the second round. No expert had him going there. By all accounts it was a reach. Turned out to be a winning move. Risking a pick, or reaching on a player because you like him is just fine. Don't be afraid to do it.

4. Do not forget to track positions of picks of other drafters, especially those behind you.

You have the 9th pick in the 6th round. You are debating between Jason Witten at Tight End and a Wide Receiver. You would love to have them both. You decide to draft Witten first and hope that the WR makes it back to you. Unfortunately the team right behind you snatches the wide receiver you wanted. Oh well, wasn't meant to be. Only you didn't bother to look at what picks 10, 11, and 12 had done before selecting Witten. Had you taken a peak, you would have noticed that they had tight ends, and weren't going to draft one there. You could have gotten the wide receiver there and waited and gotten Witten on the whip. The little things are always big.

Paying attention to what other teams have drafted is huge, and so many managers lose out on players they want because they fail to follow what the league is doing by position. When drafting a quarterback, it's imperative that you follow how many have been taken and which teams have them. If you're in the middle of the draft order, you'll better gauge the likely hood that a quarterback comes back to you in this round or not depending on the number of teams that might select a quarterback due to need. Smart owners will always target the player they want, then look around them to see whether they should take them at that moment or perhaps wait and predict out what teams around them will do. You can't do this enough. If a team near you has three running backs in their first three picks, and you are contemplating a few RBs, don't take the RB first, take something else, as surely one of the guys you like will be available on the way back to you.

This is important for teams drafting at the ends of the snake, but is useful everywhere. If you want to maximize your selections, knowing what order to pick certain positions you're debating between based on what other teams have done is a winning strategy. Don't get lazy. Keep tabs on everyone.

5. Do not Draft 2 Elite Quarterbacks in the first few rounds in hopes of trading one.

This has happened twice in the AFFL and both times by the same manager with dire consequences. You need a top tier quarterback to win the title, but good luck trying to trade one to a league of managers that knows you have to. Chances are that by selecting two elite quarterbacks in the early rounds you are missing out on wide receivers and running backs that will help your team immediately, rather than a player that will sit on your bench for five weeks until a team gets desperate. Wins are too important in a thirteen week season to throw them away, and you are increasing the likely hood that that happens by passing up on starters for a trade option. Unless you think that you can nab top ten talent in rounds 8-13, you're going to be putting your team in a huge hole to begin the year. Is it really worth it?

Aside the fact that you miss out on elite starters, you are drafting a position that is extremely deep. Last season, Nick Foles, Andy Dalton, Big Ben and others finished the season as top twelve quarterbacks, and were more than likely available off the waiver wire. Teams who are wise will opt to just take their chances off the waiver than trade one of their elite players for one of your quarterbacks. You may eventually find a trade partner, but the cost will be for much less than say the third round pick you gave for the quarterback. Don't do it. It sounds good in theory, but it ends up being a move that puts your team in a huge hole for weeks on end.

So there it is, five little reminders for you to take with you into your fantasy draft. Just remember, things will not going according to plan, and no expert is going to tell you the perfect pick when your up to select. Just sit back, trust your gut and let loose. The only decision you can make that won't be a right one will be doing what everyone else is doing. And with 11 out of ever 12 teams not winning the title every year, do you really think that's a wise strategy? Go forth young man. Draft with confidence. You got this.

categories Featured, Teams, Home Main
tags Atomic Bomba, Awesomeness, Jaj Cousteau, Magnum Sev.i, Hartan, Hangin', Grabbers, Cobra Kai, Vosgee Gyank, Bdiddy, Prime Time, HBK, General News

Hartan Mock Drafts 457 times in One Hour, Passes out, Speaks to Fantasy Gods.

August 15, 2014Raffi Lalazarian

This time of year calls for fantasy football managers to be diligent and practice drafting on mock draft sites like yahoo or fantasyfootballcalculator.com, in order to hone their skills for when their real draft comes. Some mock draft once or twice a day. Others may do it in bunches for hours on end. Hartan did it until his Iphone exploded.

Donning a blue mask and claiming to be a Superhero named Varout, Hartan awoke from a momentary lapse in consciousness late Thursday evening with fried Iphone in hand to have completed 457 mock drafts in one hour, most certainly a world record. That equates to roughly 7 mock drafts per second, which means he must have had amazing cellphone service. Four major mobile carriers have already come out and claimed that Hartan is on their companies plan. Still, the question remains, how the heck did he do it?

Donning his "Mock Fantasy Mask," Hartan mock drafts as his Superhero alter ego.. Varout.

"I basically had more than twenty-five mock draft windows open at one time," Hartan said to reporters after he was found passed out on the sidewalk near his workplace in west la. "I would draft, click, draft, click, draft, click. Before I knew it, I was borrowing other people's Iphones and drafting on theirs. It was pretty intense."

Hartan had five Iphones, two laptops, and a palm pro of all things, all belonging to strangers who had gathered around the AFFL manager to egg him on as he went for a record. During the spontaneous mock draft marathon, strangers brought beers and funneled it down Hartan's throat so as he would not miss a millisecond of any draft. After just over an hour of drafting, the Iphone in his hand exploded, sending Hartan to the ground unconscious. That's when things got deeper than this years crop of wide receivers.

Once Hartan came too, he proclaimed to have seen the fantasy gods and had a conversation with them. He described the gods as "donning three helmets, gold, silver, bronze, and a uniform that had ever NFL teams logo and colors embroidered into it." He added that they spoke to him in numbers, numbers he understood, similar to the draft system that he had been using for years.

"I realized then that all these years, our draft system was actually channeling the Fantasy Gods. That's what they told me. They told me 'two is greater than seven, unless you go five.' It made perfect sense."

Harout's Mock drafting Super Outfit: "The Ninja Lantern.' Look for him in draft rooms today.

Medical examiners will continue to keep an eye on Hartan over the next week and he has been instructed not to mock draft for at least seven days. With the AFFL draft fast approaching on the 29th, Hartan can't afford to skip mocking during the most important time of the preseason, when teams values rise on a whim. He may need a new Iphone to do so, but look for Hartan to defy doctors orders and mock like hell over these next two weeks. Nothing is more important than the AFFL draft right now, and all eyes will be on Hartan and his number system come August 29th. Not only eyes, but apparently the tongue's of the fantasy gods as well.

categories Featured, Home Main
tags Hartan, AFFL News

Building Draft Confidence: The Greatest Picks In Every AFFL Team's History

August 13, 2014Raffi Lalazarian

Confidence. You need it in all aspects of life. Whether it is approaching that curvacious woman using the elliptical machine at the gym, or deciding to select the not-so-obvious pick in the second round of a fantasy draft, the more confidence you have in yourself the better equipped you'll be to take risks and make the tough choices in life. In a fantasy draft, it's all about making tough choices, and those that take the risky road, often are rewarded. Behold the turtle, it only makes progress when it sticks its neck out.

Going into the 2014 draft, the tension will be running high, and many will crumble when their team's selection is on the clock. The choice between Doug Martin, Larry Fitzgerald, or a Quarterback will stir a philosophical conversation in a managers head that will seemingly go on for hours during the minute and a half they have to finalize their pick. And no sooner than when they proclaim their choice, they will inadvertently blurt out, "I hated that pick." Tsk. Tsk. Oh ye' with little faith. A lack of confidence indeed.

For every bust, there has been a diamond in the rough found by each manager in the AFFL, and it should be celebrated. Whether a manager can or can't draft in the AFFL could be argued for days (Will Hangin' & Bangin' nail it this year or go limp into the season again?), but each team has had their share of great picks in the past, something they can carry with pride into 2014.

So call this article a confidence piece, aimed to bolster up the fragile egos of every AFFL manager who will dare to select the perfect team come the 2014 draft. We combed through every AFFL draft since 2008 and gathered up the best picks from every AFFL team. Any draft pick was eligible, as long as they were used in their roster at some point during the season. We looked for players whose numbers were a significant increase from their draft spot. While early round picks may have been spot on, we looked for one's that would bring a little more ooh and ahhhs for the manager.

Was Josh Gordon Bomba's best pick ever? Did Ara out do himself with Peyton Manning? Was Eddie Lacy HBK's masterpiece? Did Hangin' & Bangin' make Jordy Nelson in 2013 their all-time best? We shall soon find out. Let the confidence building begin.

Jaj Cousteau

2010 - Arian Foster (2nd round. Pick #19)

Honorable Mention: 2014 - Alshon Jeffery (11th round. Pick #124)

Nothing quite like entering the league with a bang, and Jaj did just that when he selected Arian Foster in the second round of his inaugural AFFL season. Granted, Cousteau is a huge Texans fan, so we must assume that he had been doing heavy research on the team prior to the draft. Heck, he could have been talking to head coach Kubiak for all we know. During the 2010 preseason, rumors were buzzing about Foster being a prime break out candidate, and his stock began slowly climbing up draft boards. He peaked at around the end of the fourth round, which was very high for a complete unknown. When it came time for Jaj to make his selection, he didn't waiver a bit, and the entire draft room reacted with a collective "whoa," to which Jaj perked up and looked around like they were crazy. He was right. They were. Foster finished as the top fantasy back that season. Cousteau strikes again!

Awesomeness

2008 - Chris Johnson (8th round. Pick #89)

Honorable Mention: 2011 - C.J. Spiller (8th round. Pick #92)

There was one year when Chris Johnson was known as Cj2k, and that happened to be the year that Awesomeness nabbed him in the 8th round. In his first season in the league, Awesomeness launched his team to the finals thanks in large part by gambling on a rookie in the 8th round. Already gambling by taking three Atlanta falcons as his starters, David put his entire RB situation in the hands of a rookie that was unknown and not getting much pub. What ended up happening next was an entire league of managers realizing that Awesomeness was exactly that, too awesome handle on a weekly basis. It set the stage for a series of three consecutive years making the finals with back-to-back titles in '09-'10. It all began with a little known rookie out of eastern Carolina.

Vosgereechee Gyank

2012 - Andrew Luck (12th Round. Pick #143)

Back in 2012, Andrew Luck exploded on the scene as a rookie, and propelled the Colts back into immediate relevance. Waiting for a quarterback has always been a prudent move, and while the Gyank had already nabbed Tony Romo in the 8th round, he didn't hesitate to take a gamble on the rookie QB that many felt wouldn't have the weapons to pose an offense threat in the league. They were wrong, and Vosgee reaped the benefit of a top 8 QB that was gained after the 10th round. Romo finished number 7 at the position, giving his Gyankness a solid QB foundation all year long. Very nice work indeed.

Grabbers United

2010 - Darren McFadden (9th Round. Pick #101)

When the 2010 draft began, there was much speculation as to where to nab the Raiders RB who had been injury prone and labeled a bust in the previous two seasons. With no teams wanting to invest an early round pick on DMac, he slipped all the way down to the 9th round, where Grabbers United owner Sassoon took advantage. It was a low risk move with high upside, but still a gamble that eleven other managers passed up. The result? DMacs best statistical year of his career with over 1600 yards combo yards and 10 TDs. Patience is a virtue, and kudos to Grabbers for taking the plunge on a player that was thought of as a waste of a roster spot.

BDiddy

2012 - Peyton Manning (6th Round. Pick #61)

Honorable Mention: 2012- Demeriyus Thomas (5th Round. Pick #60)

The first year Peyton Manning returned from neck surgery, nobody knew what to expect. While many fantasy experts lauded Manning as a good quarterback to own, few were on board with any notion that he would finish in the top two that year at the position. After the Atomic Bomba snagged Julio Jones and Matt Ryan in the early rounds, BDiddy and company shifted to plan C, and targeted Peyton. Not only did BDiddy throw caution in the wind by drafting Manning at extremely good value in the 6th round, they went all in on the Bronco's passer by pairing him with his #1 target Demeriyus Thomas a pick earlier. The results were glowing, as Diddy made it to the semi-finals in the playoffs thanks to Manning's huge year. Bravo indeed.

Magnum Sev.i

2013 - Knowshon Moreno (14th Round. Pick #162)

Honorable Mention: 2011 - Darren Sproles (12th Round. Pick #137)

Anytime you can nab a running back in the late rounds that turns out to be an RB1 for the entire year, you've done very well for yourself. During the 2013 preseason, many fantasy aficionados were clamoring for rookie Monte Ball or 2nd year back Ronnie Hillman to be drafted in leagues. Buried on the depth chart, Moreno was looked at as more a long shot to win the job in Denver. Magnum Sev.i turned a deaf ear to the so called experts and drafted Hillman and Moreno, covering his behind in the process. While he didn't draft either as a starter, Moreno quickly emerged as his best option, finishing 4th amongst all RBs in fantasy points. You can go ahead and peg Moreno the greatest 14th round pick the AFFL has seen. Always respect the 'stache.

Hangin' & Bangin'

2009 - Ricky Williams (13th Round. Pick#155)

In between finding himself and teaching Yoga, Ricky Williams managed to briefly have a great year during his 2009 campaign. Combining for over 1400 yards and 13 TDs, Williams finished 5th amongst RBs at the position. Those numbers would peg him to be drafted somewhere between rounds 2-4 in most any fantasy football draft format. Hangin' & Bangin' (then known as the Donkey Punchers) scored big time by grabbing Ricky with their 155th overall pick. While draft hits have been hard to come by for the franchise, Bangin' did an excellent job doing their homework and nabbing a player who immediately provided RB2/1 production on a weekly basis. Granted they did eventually trade Williams at the deadline in a package deal for Wes Welker and Malcom Floyd, but not before they got the most value out of one of the best RBs in the 2009 season. It's great when you get 'em late and they reciprocate isn't it?

HBK Shant Michaels

2010 - LaDanian Tomlinson (8th Round. Pick #94)

Honorable Mention: 2013 - Eddie Lacy (3rd Round. Pick #25)

After forty other running backs went ahead of him in the 2010 AFFL Draft, LT was sitting around waiting for a suitor at the end of the 8th round where HBK Shant Michaels took a gamble on him. After years of gracing the top of the draft boards in fantasy, it was a natural fall from grace for LT as his age started to catch-up with him. Pre-Draft rankings had LT as a mid-round gamble, stating that he could end up on the back end of a time share with no goal line carries. Despite the warnings to temper expectations, HBK took a shot and was rewarded with solid RB2 numbers. His 193 fantasy points that season placed him in the top 12 at the position, leap frogging twenty eight other running backs that were drafted ahead of him. HBK definitely dropped some nice late round chin music here.

Hartan

2012 - Alfred Morris (14th Round. Pick #166)

Honorable Mention: 2009 - Brett Favre (12th Round. Pick #135)

When it comes to late round value, it doesn't get much better than Hartan's draft pick of Alfred Morris in the 2012 AFFL draft. During that years preseason, the starting running back for Mike Shanahan's offense was in limbo. He had been known to toy with fantasy owners by playing a game of musical chairs in the backfield with past teams, so taking any redskins quarterback was a yearlong gamble. While names like Helu and Royster were speculated to get the starting nod, Hartan nabbed Alfred Morris late, hoping he would eventually win the job. He did, and after a season with 1600 yards and 13 TDs which landed him in the top five amongst running backs in fantasy points, Hartan couldn't have been more pleased. Not all 14th round picks are the same. Some end up becoming RB1s and providing joy that every fantasy owner dreams of. Hartan nailed one here.

Prime Time

2011 - Steve Smith Sr. (8th Round. Pick #95)

Honorable Mention: 2013 - LeVeon Bell (9th Round. Pick #101)

In 2011, the Panthers had a rookie Cam Newton as quarterback and an aging Steve Smith coming off two of his worst seasons statistically in his career. Blending those two together brought a lot of risk when thinking about drafting Smith in any of the early rounds. Naturally, he slipped come draft day, where Prime Time nabbed him with the 95th overall pick in the 8th round. He was drafted as his 3rd wide receiver, so this wasn't just someone who was brought in for depth. Ara was drafting him as a starter. Smith rewarded Prime Time's trust with a stat line that was his 3rd highest in his career: 79 rec, 1394 yrds, 7 Tds. He finished as the 5th highest WR in fantasy and carried Prime Time all the way to the finals. Incidentally, Cam Newton wasn't even drafted, which shows just how much of a risk Ara took. Well done, just like a piece of Prime Rib.

Atomic Bomba

2010 - Peyton Hillis (14th Round. Pick #162)

Honorable Mention: 2013 - Josh Gordon (9th Round. Pick #104)

No Steve Slaton. No Deangelo Williams. This honor goes to a white RB. In 2009, Peyton Hillis was a back-up running back for the Denver Broncos. A stocky, fairly slow RB, that had pedestrian numbers. After being traded to the Cleveland Browns for Brady Quinn, Hillis had a chance to do something that nobody thought he would: Get on the cover of Madden. With the 162nd pick in the draft, Bomba targeted "White Thunder" in hopes that he would capitalize on the flashes he showed at the end of the 2009 season and become the Browns lead back. Become the lead back he did, finishing with 273 fantasy points, the most for any RB that year. The Bomba rode the Hillis train all the way to his second title in so many years. The greatest 14th round pick in the history of the AFFL. Peyton Hills. Who would have thought?

Cobra Kai

2011 - Matthew Stafford (8th Round. Pick #88)

Honorable 2013 - Mention: Antonio Brown (6th Round. Pick #60)

In 2011, Matthew Stafford was coming of major shoulder surgery, and was labeled as an injury prone quarterback. Despite the label, Stafford had tremendous upside being that he was throwing to the league's best wide receiver in Calvin Johnson, so it's a little surprising he slid as far as he did during the draft. Cobra Kai patiently laid back and waited until the 8th round to grab his QB1 without hesitation. Staffords 5,000 yard passing season would place him third amongst quarterbacks that season, just behind Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers. The 88th pick in the draft turned out to be a steal, as Stafford produced elite numbers week-in and week-out. Kudos goes to the Cobra for sitting back and waiting for the value at the position to come to him. It paid off big time. Strike first or eigth. Strike Hard. Show no Mercy. He-ya!

categories Featured, Home Main
tags Awesomeness, Atomic Bomba, Hartan, Jaj Cousteau, Magnum Sev.i, Hangin', Grabbers, Prime Time, Bdiddy, Cobra Kai, Vosgee Gyank, AFFL News

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