Champions Unite! Cousteau Signs Deal with Seahawks to open Seahawk Jaj Club.

The Coustau Championship Tour keeps on rolling along, this time up north in Seattle, where early Thursday morning the AFFL Champion inked a deal with the Superbowl Champion Seahawks to open an exclusive Seahawk Jaj Club at Century Link field. The merger of the two franchises will be the biggest merger for an AFFL franchise since Prime Time signed an endorsement deal with Waste Management immediately following the drafting of his 2010 AFFL team.

Cousteau manager Chris was excited about the deal, as was Seahawk GM John Schneider, who called the Jaj Club, "a place we all need in every stadium."

"I think when you're talking about Jaj, you're talking about the essence of football," said Schnieder. "We just wanted a little Seahawk Jaj in the Stadium and we got it."

The Seahawk Jaj club will be a room full of Seahawk Jaj, a combination of Seahawk and Cousteau imagery. Membership will be open to all fans on a first served, first come basis. Hot dogs in fresh buns will be available for members to enjoy, complete with a condiment bar. Fans of both teams will enjoy light music andfriendly atmosphere where they can mingle and get to know one another more intimately. Whether it is to talk about team Cousteau and shoot the Jaj, or discuss the possibility of a new Seahawk Jaj logo, there will be something for everyone.

"We really want to make this Club about Seahawk Jaj," said Cousteau owner Chris. "It's something new for me, but I'm excited about it."

Seahawk officials have not yet settled on when the Jaj Club will be opened, but many believe it won't be until next season.

Seahawk Jaj Club. Cumming soon.

But you know what they say: the bigger the build up, the bigger the release.

In the meantime, team Cousteau looks to be the first team since the Atomic Bomba to win back-to-back titles. If the first two weeks of the season are any indication, it looks like he'll get a shot to do just that.

With a 2-0 record and the most points in the AFFL, Jaj sits atop the the entire league. Kinda like a Seahawk Jajing from above. Oh the irony.

Prime Time wakes up to Discover He Really traded Le'Veon Bell.

"What the F*@% did I do?"

That was the response from Prime Time owner Ara after he was awoken early Friday morning by his wife Taleen and told that he did indeed trade one of the top running backs in Le'Veon Bell to Cobra Kai for multiple players. Rocking some sweet bed-hair, Ara immediately ran to his computer and checked his line-up to confirm the transaction. He then somberly walked into the bathroom and took a leak.

"What I did, I did," said Ara to AFFL reporters later that day. "What was done was done. It is what it is. You can't change what you can't change. We move forward to move forward."

It is quite obvious that Ara might not have been conscious when making the trade that sent Bell along with Brandon Cooks, Deangelo Williams and Vincent Jackson for a haul of injured running backs and wide receivers with quarterback problems. Despite this, the trade would not be reversed even if Ara had buyers remorse. All trades are final.

Bell is one of the top running backs in the league, and has been a keeper for Prime Time over the past two seasons. Having been suspended the first two games of the year, Bell hasn't even had a chance to hit the field, which is why many managers are confused about the trade.

"I guess he just wants to cash in when his value is high," said BDiddy co-manager monkey mike. "He's always been an a-hole to us co-managers so I hope it bites him in the ass."

Prime Time's draft grade wasn't especially great, and concern over the lack of impact players could be the primary reason Ara pulled this trade. Of course, this is Prime Time, and very little done by Ara has turned out well in the trade market. This is the same manager that drafted two qbs twice and traded a top five qb for a running back who was cut two weeks later.

We can't give Ara all the blame, just as it's unfair to give him all the credit as well. There's a good possibility that the didn't even know what was going on even while he was negotiating the deal with Cobra Kai. We wouldn't be shocked if Ara indeed made a move that he wasn't even aware of. He has a lot of stuff going on.... like life.

But a manager not knowing he made a trade would only lead to one logical conclusion, that someone other than Ara helped to facilitate the deal.

AFFL reporters speculate that an outsider by the name of House Tutu, who himself is a manager in another league, helped broker the deal and left Prime Time out-of-the-loop on the parameters. Reports claim that total trust in House Tutu's player evaluation left him in full control of the trade. Ara being totally clueless about the trade this morning only further establishes House Tutu as the ghost trader; or it could be that Ara is just clueless.

Prime Time denies that such a person exists, for he knows the ramifications that would follow if it were found out that he used a "co-manager."

Literal Image of just who or what house tutu can be. For all we know, Ara may have talked to an actual house.

"I don't know who this House Tutu Mootu guy is. I don't deal with co-managers. Why would I have someone else help me if I don't deal with managers that are helping me deal with someone else helping me? It doesn't make sense."

Nothing Ara says makes much sense, just like his last statement, and it would be a huge controversy should the reports of outside help be true. AFFL co-managers would have a field day.

"If he got help on a trade, then I think the should be kicked out of the league for hypocrisy," said BDiddy owner Baret. "I know it's extreme, but I didn't even get an extra chair for my managers in the draft, bro. I know my co-managers weren't there but still. It's principle."

Ara has vehemently denied co-manager's rights at drafts and spoken out against them in the league. If House Tutu Mootu turns out to be real, it could be a rough week of damage control for Prime Time.

It looks like it's already been a rough morning.

AFFL Draft Grades 2015: Hangin' is Bangin'. Looks Poised for Break Out Season.

After an eventful Friday night that featured the introduction of the first Intercontinental Championship Belt of the AFFL, a Luchador Bomba, and Ara drafting as if he were throwing darts at draft board, the 2015 AFFL draft is in the books. Of course, every manager walked away from the draft with confidence that their draft picks were solid (except Prime Time) and are now anxiously awaiting the first game of the 2015 NFL season. When week one arrives, managers will slowly transition their fantasy mind into fantasy depression, where upon the arrival of week three they will frequently use the most famous of fantasy phrases "what the f*** was I thinking drafting this guy?".  It's a year long struggle and the struggle is very real.

The time between the draft and opening day is a time that is used to analyze, scrutinize and criticize everything that has to do with perception. Every team has chosen players based on who the they think were the best pick at those specific spots, and over fifty percent of those picks will be incorrect. The AFFL grades do not intend to say which team is good or bad, but rather examine the thinking behind the draft of each manager. It is an assessment of how likely the perception of the players chosen by a particular manager becomes a reality. In Prime Time's case, that perception is seen through a dirty window, with closed blinds, during the blackest night, by a blind man who is looking for a black cat that isn't there. That's a roundabout way of saying that his team doesn't look good. 

So here you go. Four categories: big winners, mild winners, mild losers, and big losers (no affiliation with the show). No guarantees about how bad a team will be, so if you're a team in the Loser category (Prime Time), hey, there is no where to go but up! Did we mention Prime Time had a bad draft? Okay. Let's go.

Big Winners

Hangin' and Bangin'

Keepers: Jeremy Hill (4th), Mike Evans (5th)

Draft Picks: 1. (4) Demaryius Thomas (Den - WR) 2. (16) Justin Forsett (Bal - RB) 3. (32) Jimmy Graham (Sea - TE) 4. (40) Jeremy Hill  (Cin - RB) 5. (52) Mike Evans  (TB - WR) 6. (64) Golden Tate (Det - WR) 7. (76) Shane Vereen (NYG - RB) 8. (88) Russell Wilson (Sea - QB) 9. (100) Eric Decker (NYJ - WR) 10. (112) Michael Crabtree (Oak - WR) 11. (124) Charles Sims (TB - RB) 12. (136) Brian Quick (StL - WR) 13. (148) Marvin Jones (Cin - WR) 14. (160) Austin Seferian-Jenkins (TB - TE) 15. (172) New England (NE - DEF) 16. (184) Steven Hauschka (Sea - K)

Loved: Graham (3rd), Tate (6th), Wilson (8th), Marvin Jones (13th)

Didn't Understand: Drafting 7 Wrs.

This draft began in 2014. At the end of last season, Hangin' traded Jordy Nelson for Mike Evans and Travis Kelce. Fast forward to 2015. Jordy Nelson is out with a torn ACL and Mike Evans is a keeper three rounds after where he should be drafted. What a trade. Coming into the draft, Hangin' had perhaps the best valued keepers and really would have had to try and screw things up. They did a marvelous job of getting guys with great VALUE (AFFL managers love that word). Many of their selections were made after a players projected ADP. Jimmy Graham was had for a third round pick, after they had considered drafting him in the second round. Wilson was drafted in the 8th round and is considered a top five QB. Even their late picks, Charles Sims and Marvin Jones have nice upside. They are deep at every position and have top tier talent across the board. There really isn't much to nit pick at this draft (maybe Austin Seferian-Jenkins, but he's Armenian. Much love for drafting the Armo). If the team stays healthy, we just don't see how Hangin' doesn't have a winning season. They have yet to win a playoff game in the history of their franchise. Could this be the year they finally do it? If it's not now, it just may be never.

Grade - A

Hartan

Keepers: Odell Beckham Jr. (8th)

Draft Picks: 1. (7) A.J. Green (Cin - WR) 2. (19) Mark Ingram (NO - RB) 3. (29) Andre Ellington (Ari - RB) 4. (43) Todd Gurley (StL - RB) 5. (55) Jeremy Maclin (KC - WR) 6. (67) Ryan Mathews (Phi - RB) 7. (79) Mike Wallace (Min - WR) 8. (91) Odell Beckham Jr.  (NYG - WR) 9. (103) Philip Rivers (SD - QB) 10. (115) Delanie Walker (Ten - TE) 11. (127) Cam Newton (Car - QB) 12. (139) Dorial Green-Beckham (Ten - WR) 13. (151) Jerick McKinnon (Min - RB) 14. (163) Buffalo (Buf - DEF) 15. (175) Rueben Randle (NYG - WR) 16. (187) Brandon McManus (Den - K)

Loved: Maclin (5th), Matthews (6th), Wallace (7th)

Didn't Understand: Newton as Back-up.

Like Hangin', Hartan began the draft with a wonderfully valued keeper, perhaps the best in the draft. The luxury of having Beckham in the 8th round is that it allows you to take risks and not feel all that worried about it. Looking at the approach to the draft, Hartan opted to lean heavy on RB's early and fill the gap at WR late. Wise move. Aj Green and Beckham will be very formidable, and there is enough to like at the RB spots to know that things should be okay. Ingram/Ellington/Gurly/Matthews, should provide enough points to stay competitive, providing they stay healthy. If we do have a quarrel about Hartan's draft it's that he could potentially have some downside at his TE and QB spots. Perhaps having a Beckham and Green locked up would have made it wiser to grab a top tier QB or TE in the mid-rounds. We'd also be concerned about Cam Newton as a backup QB. Still, with all that said, a starting line-up of Ingram and Ellington paired with Aj, ODBJ, and Maclin should be very strong.

Grade - A-

Mild Winners

BDiddy

Keepers: None

Draft Picks: 1. (1) Marshawn Lynch (Sea - RB) 2. (13) DeMarco Murray (Phi - RB) 3. (36) Andre Johnson (Ind - WR) 4. (37) Amari Cooper (Oak - WR) 5. (49) Ben Roethlisberger (Pit - QB) 6. (61) Nelson Agholor (Phi - WR) 7. (73) Alfred Blue (Hou - RB) 8. (85) Martavis Bryant (Pit - WR) 9. (97) Pierre Garcon (Was - WR) 10. (109) Tom Brady (NE - QB) 11. (121) Jordan Cameron (Mia - TE) 12. (133) Darren Sproles (Phi - RB) 13. (145) Robert Turbin (Sea - RB) 14. (157) Javorius Allen (Bal - RB) 15. (169) Detroit (Det - DEF) 16. (181) Adam Vinatieri (Ind - K)

Loved: Lynch (1), Big Ben (5th), Bryant (8th),

Didn't Understand: Brady 10th (no need), Lots of rookie Wrs and Vet as Wr core.

Team Bdiddy had a good draft. We know that because they never shifted from plan A. That must be a good thing. The question is, was plan A good enough? It's apparent that picking first, Diddy decided that the value in WRs were not at the top of the draft, but in the middle. Electing to go Lynch was the right move, but Demarco Murray could be in a three man committee. Would it have been wiser to nab Rogers or go WR? That is debatable. In any case, the middle of the roster is loaded with young Wrs and an old veteran. While the offenses of these teams are quite stellar, there could be a big question mark on health and consistent production. After all, Sammy Watkins was drafted last season in the same vein as Amari Cooper, and things didn't pan out. There was also lots to like about the late picks. Getting Blue and Bryant could be huge, since both will be key contributors to their teams. We don't know whether the Brady pick will pay off or not, but it's not a bad gamble at that point. All-in-all BDiddy did a solid job of building a team that has lots of upside mixed with some uncertainty. If the rookies pan out, the two year playoff drought of the B franchise may finally be over.

Grade - B

Cobra Kai

Keepers: Lamar Miller (5th), Jordan Matthews (6th)

Draft Picks: 1. (10) Calvin Johnson (Det - WR) 2. (22) Melvin Gordon (SD - RB) 3. (26) C.J. Spiller (NO - RB) 4. (46) Greg Olsen (Car - TE) 5. (58) Lamar Miller  (Mia - RB) 6. (70) Jordan Matthews  (Phi - WR) 7. (82) Allen Robinson (Jax - WR) 8. (94) LeGarrette Blount (NE - RB) 9. (106) Tony Romo (Dal - QB) 10. (118) Roddy White (Atl - WR) 11. (130) Sam Bradford (Phi - QB) 12. (142) Reggie Bush (SF - RB) 13. (154) Andre Williams (NYG - RB) 14. (166) Kelvin Benjamin (Car - WR) 15. (178) Miami (Mia - DEF) 16. (190) Justin Tucker (Bal - K)

Loved: Olsen (4th), Robinson (7th), Romo (9th), Benjamin (keeper)

Didn't Understand: Gordon (over Ameer), Spiller (that early)

With a pair of nice keeper values in the mid rounds, Cobra Kai set himself up nicely entering the draft. It was going to be unlikely that the team came out of the draft without a solid team. Indeed they did. There were a ton of picks that were taken well beyond their ADP.  Olsen Robinson, Blount were all picks that slid a bit and rendered great value for the Kai. We weren't too excited with some of the picks that went early in the draft. While Megatron was a nice choice in the first, Melvin Gordon and CJ spiller seem a bit of a reach at those spots. Would the team look better had they gone with a 0 Rb strategy and taken Andre Johnson and another WR, perhaps Adams? What about an upside guy like Abdullah or Gurly?  Its debatable. Of course none of this matters if Gordon or Spiller stay healthy and produce all season long. A reach really is only a reach if the player turns out to be a major bust. Factor in a few nice upside Rbs at the end of the draft, and there isn't really much of an issue with how Kai approached formulating his team. Lamar Miller and Jordan Matthews gave the Cobra a head start on strong roster. Looks like the job was completed on Friday night.

Grade - B

Jaj Cousteau

Keepers: Jamaal Charles (1st), Antonio Brown (2nd)

Draft Picks: 1. (12) Jamaal Charles  (KC - RB) 2. (24) Antonio Brown  (Pit - WR) 3. (25) Ameer Abdullah (Det - RB) 4. (48) Chris Ivory (NYJ - RB) 5. (60) Charles Johnson (Min - WR) 6. (72) Markus Wheaton (Pit - WR) 7. (84) Ryan Tannehill (Mia - QB) 8. (96) Knile Davis (KC - RB) 9. (108) Terrance Williams (Dal - WR) 10. (120) Tyler Eifert (Cin - TE) 11. (132) Teddy Bridgewater (Min - QB) 12. (144) Cameron Artis-Payne (Car - RB) 13. (156) Donte Moncrief (Ind - WR) 14. (168) Vernon Davis (SF - TE) 15. (180) Indianapolis (Ind - DEF) 16. (192) Nick Novak (SD - K)

Loved: Ameer Abdullah (risk reward could afford), Ivory (4th), Tannahill (7th)

Didn't Understand: Charles Johnson (5th), Colts Defense

Disclaimer: A Jaj Cousteau draft really can't be evaluated. All players taken by the Cousteau franchise will most likely end up out performing their ADP, even though they were taken way too soon in most cases. However, despite the crazy draft picking of his team, Cousteau managed to do well enough to be competitive. Charles and Brown already provided ridiculous value late in the first and second rounds respectively, so Jaj was already ahead of the game. Opting for upside, the Ameer Abdullah pick early in the third was a surprise, but one that can pay off in a big way. We like the risk considering Charles is already a great value. Ivory was taken at pick 48, perhaps too high, but one can't argue that he's the clear workhorse back in an offense that should be forced to lean on the run. Tannehill in the seventh is great. It was wise to snag the QB there because he wasn't going to make it back. We scratch our head at Charles Johnson over some other Wrs, but can't fault Jaj for liking the wide out. The TE position could be a mess, but then again, Vernon Davis may be due for a breakout. All-in-all, a solid cumming out party for Cousteau. He should be in the thick of things come week 5.

Grade - B

Vosgee Gyank

Keepers: CJ Anderson (7th)

Draft Picks: 1. (5) Julio Jones (Atl - WR) 2. (17) T.Y. Hilton (Ind - WR) 3. (31) Jonathan Stewart (Car - RB) 4. (41) T.J. Yeldon (Jax - RB) 5. (53) Martellus Bennett (Chi - TE) 6. (65) Torrey Smith (SF - WR) 7. (77) C.J. Anderson  (Den - RB) 8. (89) Matt Ryan (Atl - QB) 9. (101) James Starks (GB - RB) 10. (113) Marques Colston (NO - WR) 11. (125) Montee Ball (Den - RB) 12. (137) Brandon LaFell (NE - WR) 13. (149) Houston (Hou - DEF) 14. (161) Kendall Wright (Ten - WR) 15. (173) Jacquizz Rodgers (Chi - RB) 16. (185) Phil Dawson (SF - K)

Loved: Julio (1st), TY Hilton (2nd), Yeldon (4th)

Didn't Understand: Torrey Smith (6th), James Starks (9th)

Stop me if you've heard this before. Vosgee has a decent draft. Vosgee then suffers injuries or mismanages his team. Vosgee ends up at the bottom of the league. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. That has basically been the way of the Gyank for the past few years. Entering the 2015 draft he had a great opportunity to turn the tides of misfortune with a keeper like CJ Anderson in the seventh round. For the most part, we think he did well. A one-two punch of Julio and TY are going to be lethal, and the roster has lots of other nice pieces to complement Anderson (barring injury). Things could have been extremely good if Gyank didn't taper off in the middle rounds with the Torrey Smith pick. That was perplexing. However, Wright could be great value in the fourteenth round. Taking Matt Ryan to pair with Julio was nice as well, especially considering where Ryan went. While the roster may not have crazy depth, there is enough to like about the line-up despite the middle round blunders. We're gonna hold out hope that Gyank did enough to turn the corner in 2015. The franchise really needs to.

Grade - B-

Awesomeness

Keepers: AP (1st), Hopkins (5th)

Draft Picks: Awesomeness VII 1. (2) Adrian Peterson  (Min - RB) 2. (14) Aaron Rodgers (GB - QB) 3. (34) Davante Adams (GB - WR) 4. (38) Arian Foster (Hou - RB) 5. (50) DeAndre Hopkins  (Hou - WR) 6. (62) Joique Bell (Det - RB) 7. (74) Giovani Bernard (Cin - RB) 8. (86) DeSean Jackson (Was - WR) 9. (98) Danny Woodhead (SD - RB) 10. (110) Zach Ertz (Phi - TE) 11. (122) Roy Helu Jr. (Oak - RB) 12. (134) Owen Daniels (Den - TE) 13. (146) Chris Polk (Hou - RB) 14. (158) Steve Smith Sr. (Bal - WR) 15. (170) Philadelphia (Phi - DEF) 16. (182) Cody Parkey (Phi - K)

Loved: Davante Adams (3rd) Joique Bell (6th), Steve Smith (14th)

Didn't Understand: Foster (4th), Owen Daniels/ Ertz TE's, No Ap handcuff

Placing Awesomeness here comes with a disclaimer. This team will be either a big winner or big loser depending on Arian Foster. We will give the Awesome one the benefit of the doubt when it comes to the Foster pick and expect to see him back in a month. Having AP and Hopkins as a core is fairly strong, and adding Rodgers to it gives the team a threesome that is very formidable at those positions. The Wr complements aren't exciting but offer plenty of upside. The biggest holes are at TE and the RB2 spot. However, Joique is an unsexy solid pick, and if he can stabilize the position until Foster returns, then there is much to like about the line-up. Where the team makes the grade is in the late rounds. Steve Smith for a 14th pick is ridiculous. That will pay off well. It is clear that Awesomeness attempted to use his two keepers to take risks elsewhere. Those risks may turn out to be the difference of finishing first or last. It all rests on the groin of Arian Foster. If his inner scrotum is strong, look out. If it's not, it's gonna be an un-awesome season.

Grade - B-

Mild Losers

Atomic BOMBA ®

Keepers: Carlos Hyde (3rd), Joseph Randle (7th)

Draft Picks: 1. (6) Randall Cobb (GB - WR) 2. (18) Latavius Murray (Oak - RB) 3. (30) Carlos Hyde  (SF - RB) 4. (42) Julian Edelman (NE - WR) 5. (54) Travis Kelce (KC - TE) 6. (66) John Brown (Ari - WR) 7. (78) Joseph Randle  (Dal - RB) 8. (90) Eddie Royal (Chi - WR) 9. (102) Devonta Freeman (Atl - RB) 10. (114) Eli Manning (NYG - QB) 11. (126) Kenny Stills (Mia - WR) 12. (138) Jordy Nelson (GB - WR) 13. (150) Jonas Gray (NE - RB) 14. (162) Anquan Boldin (SF - WR) 15. (174) Denver (Den - DEF) 16. (186) Matt Bryant (Atl - K)

Loved: Cobb (1st), Kelce (5th), John Brown (6th), Jordy Nelson (keeper)

Didn't understand: Eddie Royal (too early), Kenny Stills (11th)

Bomba a loser? That just doesn't seem to jive together. However, the team that has been a mainstay in the AFFL discussion didn't exactly wow the crowd with his draft. To be truthful, this grade has much to do with the aftermath of the draft as much as it does with the draft itself. Cobb is already banged up, and Randle's value has completely plummeted. Those two factors alone will force the team to downgrade a bit. But taking a look at the Bomba draft, the team was took a few players at spots before where they should have gone, including their keepers. Hyde was kept a bit before where he was going to go, and Royal was perhaps a reach in the 8th. The good news is that there is lots of upside on the roster with the likes of Murray and John Brown. Bold in in the 14th round is also a nice get for a consistent WR3. However, this roster has the potential of being a complete bust should the question marks not pan out. Injuries to stars may leave the Bomba with very little spark. We also don't know what possessed the Atomic one to draft Stills in the 12th. That was a horrible move. The good news is that if everything goes south, there is always the option of keeping Jordy Nelson for an 8th round pick. Here's to hoping that it won't be the only thing Bomba has to look forward to.

Grade - C+

HBK Shant Michaels

Keepers: Eddie Lacy (1st), Alshon Jeffery (3rd)

Draft Picks: 1. (9) Eddie Lacy  (GB - RB) 2. (21) Frank Gore (Ind - RB) 3. (33) Alshon Jeffery  (Chi - WR) 4. (45) Jarvis Landry (Mia - WR) 5. (57) Doug Martin (TB - RB) 6. (69) Victor Cruz (NYG - WR) 7. (81) David Johnson (Ari - RB) 8. (93) Stevie Johnson (SD - WR) 9. (105) Devin Funchess (Car - WR) 10. (117) Matthew Stafford (Det - QB) 11. (129) Brandon Coleman (NO - WR) 12. (141) Matt Jones (Was - RB) 13. (153) Kyle Rudolph (Min - TE) 14. (165) St. Louis (StL - DEF) 15. (177) Jay Ajayi (Mia - RB) 16. (189) Mason Crosby (GB - K).

Loved: Landry (4th),  Stafford (10th), Matt Jones (12th). Rudolph (13th),

Didn't Understand: Cruz (6th), David Johnson (7th). Lots of rookies as depth.

HBK is the man with a plan when it comes to the draft. He usually has a nice map of what he would like to do. Examining his draft, it is likely that the team deviated from their plan. The flow of picks perhaps forced HBK to take guys that he wasn't planning on taking. Lacy and Jeffery gave the team two nice pieces to begin, and Gore is a solid enough pick in the second to keep the team strong. But the middle rounds offered up some questionable decisions. Doug Martin, Victor cruz, and David Johnson were all picks that could have very little impact on the roster. Cruz is already hurt, Martin plays for a bad team with no o-line, and Johnson may only get third down work. This can all go very wrong very quickly. Waiting on QB and TE seemed to be the right strategy and getting a Kyle Rudolph in the latter rounds could be a huge boon for Michaels. As is, the team has few nice upside rookies along with solid starters, but we wonder what could have been if lets say the squad elected to take Martavius Bryant, John Brown or Agholor instead of Cruz and Martin, and jumped on a RB like Blue or Blount in the latter rounds. We think a lot better. But don't just take our word for it. This was a message the Courier received from Michaels regarding is projected grade:
 

"I see you giving me a B-/C+. HBK rollin the dice on rookies as always. Solid keepers to start. Solid Rb depth. Too many rookies. Not enough Wrs. QB is a question mark. Picks liked: Rudolph 13th. Matt jones. I just did the analysis for you. Move on to the next one."

Indeed you did HBK. And you were practically spot on. But not to fret, the HBK has found his way to the playoffs two years in a row. There is a good chance he will right the ship.

Grade - C+

Grabbers United

Keepers: Rob Gronkowski (1st), Andrew Luck (2nd)

Draft Picks: 1. (8) Rob Gronkowski  (NE - TE) 2. (20) Andrew Luck  (Ind - QB) 3. (28) Alfred Morris (Was - RB) 4. (44) Sammy Watkins (Buf - WR) 5. (56) Rashad Jennings (NYG - RB) 6. (68) Brandon Marshall (NYJ - WR) 7. (80) Isaiah Crowell (Cle - RB) 8. (92) Duke Johnson Jr. (Cle - RB) 9. (104) Darren McFadden (Dal - RB) 10. (116) Reggie Wayne (NE - WR) 11. (128) Jeff Janis (GB - WR) 12. (140) Dwayne Bowe (Cle - WR) 13. (152) Ray Rice (Bal - RB) 14. (164) Jameis Winston (TB - QB) 15. (176) New York (NYJ - DEF) 16. (188) Dan Bailey (Dal - K)

Loved: Jennings (5th), Marshall (6th), Jeff Janis (11th)

Didn't Understand: Watkins (4th), Ray Rice (13th), Double Cleveland Rbs.

Team Grabbers came into the draft with two keepers in the first two rounds, so things were difficult right off the bat for the team. Going without a selection for nearly 35 picks made the task of putting together a strong squad excruciatingly difficult. Alfred Morris and Jennings however were two wise picks to help offset the sieve that could have been the RB position. We didn't think there was any around the fact that the team would be left starving at the WR position and that is exactly the case. However, there is a lot of sneaky upside with Brandon Marshall and Sammy Watkins so all is not lost. Investing in the Cleveland Brown RB situation is never a good thing, and doubling down on it, well that may be fantasy suicide. Late in the draft, Grabbers managed to selecta few nice upside pieces in McFadden and Janis. Those two could become starters in the near future. Ray Rice in the thirteenth wasn't necessary. If the Grabbers team is going to make headway this season, it will be on the arm of Andrew Luck and on the back of Gronk. There are a lot of potentially strong parts that could help carry the load, but it also looks like the supporting cast could fall apart quickly and not recover. We're in a wait and see approach for Grabbers, and aren't going to count him out, but won't exactly endorse the team yet either.

Grade - C

 

Big Loser

Magnum Sev.i

Keepers: Emmanuel Sanders (3rd)

Draft Picks: 1. (3) Dez Bryant (Dal - WR) 2. (15) LeSean McCoy (Buf - RB) 3. (27) Emmanuel Sanders  (Den - WR) 4. (39) Peyton Manning (Den - QB) 5. (51) Keenan Allen (SD - WR) 6. (63) Tevin Coleman (Atl - RB) 7. (75) Jason Witten (Dal - TE) 8. (87) Tre Mason (StL - RB) 9. (99) Larry Fitzgerald (Ari - WR) 10. (111) Fred Jackson (Buf - RB) 11. (123) Denard Robinson (Jax - RB) 12. (135) Ronnie Hillman (Den - RB) 13. (147) Cody Latimer (Den - WR) 14. (159) Stephen Gostkowski (NE - K) 15. (171) Arizona (Ari - DEF) 16. (183) Cordarrelle Patterson (Min - WR)

Loved: Keenan Allen (5th)

Didn't Understand: Tevin Coleman (6th), No true RB2, Suspect WR depth.

We're not gonna call their team a bust, or not likely to do some damage. But from a purely draft stand point, the Sev.i missed on more picks than it made. First off, there is still lots of good on the roster. Dez and Sanders should be a fine WR core, and Allen should be good as a WR3. The areas that is most concerning is the RB core. Lesean McCoy already has a hamstring issue, and the depth behind him is Tevin Coleman, Tre mason, Fred Jackson, Denard Robinson and Ronnie Hillman. Yikes. None of those names are in situations that inspire confidence. Injuries will have to play a role as to whether they become relevant at all. Couple that with the fact that teams later picks have little upside, and we don't know what to make of things should bye weeks hit. One thing is for certain, Tevin Coleman in the 6th round was probably too high for a rookie in a time share with a bad O-line. Ultimately, the team Sev.i will be relying on their Wrs to carry their roster. If a few injuries to some lead backs happen, then their roster would look a whole lot better. Until that happens, we're gonna have to say that there is a lot of uncertainty on their selection of RBs. With all due respect to the stache.

Grade - C-

Prime Time

Keepers: Levon Bell (3rd), Brandon Cooks (4th)

Draft Picks: 1. (11) Matt Forte (Chi - RB) 2. (23) Drew Brees (NO - QB) 3. (35) Le'Veon Bell  (Pit - RB) 4. (47) Brandin Cooks  (NO - WR) 5. (59) Vincent Jackson (TB - WR) 6. (71) Michael Floyd (Ari - WR) 7. (83) Breshad Perriman (Bal - WR) 8. (95) Bishop Sankey (Ten - RB) 9. (107) DeAngelo Williams (Pit - RB) 10. (119) DeVante Parker (Mia - WR) 11. (131) David Cobb (Ten - RB) 12. (143) Jeremy Langford (Chi - RB) 13. (155) Seattle (Sea - DEF) 14. (167) Ty Montgomery (GB - WR) 15. (179) Josh Hill (NO - TE) 16. (191) Matt Prater (Det - K)

Loved: Handcuffing LeVon bell with Deangelo Williams to guarantee a starting RB week 1.

Didn't Understand: Everything. Drafting injured players. Just Everything. Still don't.

We are as surprised as you. Prime Time walked into the draft like a stuttering dyslexic trying to win a reading contest. It was quite apparent early on that he was ill prepared for what was going down Friday night.  Drew Brees had no business being drafted in the second round. Considering that Levon Bell was already a superb value in the 3rd round, it would take a stroke of genius to screw this roster up. Enter the IQ of Prime Time. Michael Floyd is injured and fallen out of favor in Zona. Perriman is hurt and has no time table to return. Vincent Jackson has a rookie Qb and is a second fiddle deep threat on an offense that has no o-line. David Cobb is injured. As is Devante Parker. We could go on for days. There is quite honestly not a selection on the roster, aside from the keepers, that has any value. It was clear that Prime Time was in over his head when it came to the draft and now has the arduous process of trying to rectify a terrible situation. Breaking down which players should have been selected instead of the ones that were taken will take days. Rather, its easier to just step back and call the whole thing a mess, one that Prime Time will have to find his way out of. We're not saying that the team will be horrible. We're saying that the teams perceived strength is the worst of all teams. That makes Prime Time the biggest loser of the draft.

Grade - F-

BREAKING!: Jaj Cousteau Fined $50 For Keeper Violations. Commissioner asks for Cell Phone.

Jaj Cousteau Manager Chris's reaction after discovering he had been fined $50

The AFFL was hit with its first scandal of the 2015 season on Thursday morning when Commissioner Lalazarian announced that current AFFL champion Jaj Cousteau would be fined fifty dollars by the league for violations relating to keeper player procedure. 

"I have spoken with the Commissioner and will accept the fine," said manager Chris in front of reporters early Thursday morning. "We're disappointed in what happened, but like everything else, you just have to Jaj on."

The violations occurred late Monday night, when Chris forgot to make his keeper selections.  After he was contacted by the league in light of this error, Chris asked that the oversight be fixed. AFFL rules stipulate that all managers can elect to keep up to two players from their previous years roster if they so choose, but selections must be made prior to the keeper selection deadline. Any changes made after that deadline would be open to league mandated fines or the loss of draft picks.  The two keepers he failed to keep were Jamaal Charles and Antonio Brown.

Commissioner Lalazarian addressed the situation Thursday morning.

"Managers must understand that the rules are rules for a reason, and nobody is above them, not even a team with as cool a name as Cousteau. Mr. Jaj has failed to follow procedure and so he must now pay for it.  And he will. 'I didn't get the text message is no excuse."

What has caught the ire of the commissioner is that the league made it a point to avoid this type of situation with frequent reminders to managers over the past two months. Subsequently, the league sent out text messages reminding managers to set their keepers the night of the deadline, a text message that Chris says he never received. 

Reports out of AFFL headquarters claim that the Commissioner became "incensed" with Chris's lack of follow through and excuses, and the two "had it out." The situation has escalated to the point that the office requested that Chris hand over his cell phone so the league can examine text messages and phone settings. It is not clear if Chris has followed through with the request. A few people close to the AFFL manager suggested that the phone may have been destroyed in a "jaj accident." Further penalties could be forth coming.

The "Cousteau cover-up" comes at a terrible time as the league is prepares for the 2015 AFFL draft this Friday at 8:30pm at the house of Cousteau.   It remains to be seen if the negative publicity will have an effect on the draft and on the way Chris drafts. It is unfortunate that the team that is hosting the draft is forced to hand over monetary fines despite their hospitality.

But, as Chris puts it, "sometimes you forget to Jaj. It happens. The more important lesson is that you don't forget the second time."

More to cum..

AFFL Franchise Rankings: 2015 Edition

Managers in the AFFL will often claim that, besides Bomba, their team deserves to be recognized as a "successful" franchise. They will profess that they draft exceptionally well, trade players at the perfect time, and if things went wrong, it was because of injuries and never about their managerial skills. Yeah. Sure.

But let's put the managers of these teams aside and just focus on results. Some managers can take a decrepit roster and make the most out of it. Others can ruin a perfectly good situation in the blink of an eye. Whichever the case may be, where they finish at seasons end builds up their franchise's value (or takes it down a notch). The more you win, the better your team's brand is. Rack up losses and sub-five-hundred seasons and those team jerseys wont exactly be flying off the shelves.

So how should we rank the AFFL brands? In this article, we'll attempt to rank each team's franchise based solely on their brand's value. We will take into consideration the end of the year finishes, lifetime record, as well as factor in some caveats such as number of years in the league and whether or not a team has a co-manager (the Prime Time rule) in order to determine which team names have the most impact in the league.

At the end of the day, it's all about what goes on the mantle. Teams aren't considered great because of a great trade here or there, or a how strong of a draft they had. It's about how many trophies you have to show for it. Those trophies or lack there of bolster or hinder a team's brand image, which correlates to the impact a team has on the league.

Let's get at it then. Your 2015 brand value ranking.

The Formula

We looked at every team and the place they finished at seasons end. We gave each place a point value then added those numbers together to render a team's composite place ranking.  Top three finishes were weighed heavier than others. Here is a chart of the scale.  

Basically, each top three finish is valued at a slightly better value than other playoff teams. Finishes that are not in the top six were weighed heavier than those that were. 

Supposing that Team A finished in 3rd, 6th, 8th, and 2nd. They would would have a total place value of 18 (2 +6 +9 +1). 

After gathering the average composite place of Team A, we then took the career winning percentage and converted that to a career win score. We did this by multiplying the lifetime career win percentage of a team into 13, the number of regular season games in any given year.  This gave the team a career win mark placement. 

Let's say Team A was 34-38 over their career, a 47% winning percentage. Multiplying .47 into 13 would give us 6.11. So Team A's career win mark would be 6.11. We did this with every team and created a career win standings, giving each team an overall place of finish. Once we had our standings, we took each place and converted it to a point value, just as we did earlier with their career finishes, and added it to their existing total. Lastly, we divided this number by the total years, plus one, they had been in the league. This gave us a value that included weight for career finishes as well as win/loss record. 

We added all the points together and then divided by the number of years the team was in the league plus one.

Here is the formula

Total composite place mark(all places added by converted point value) + career win mark standing point value (win%x13 converted to point value)/ # of years in the league plus one.

The Parts

Below is a chart with each teams career place finishes, along with the total point value. Click on the image to make it larger.

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Each place is given a Value and added up for a total. Number of years in league are given to give a perspective.

After gathering the Composite place value, we took the career records of all teams in the AFFL and created standings based on career win percentage. We took the career win percentage and multiplied that into 13 to get a total career win mark. Playoff percentages were used to break ties, as well as total number of games played. The chart is below

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Now, converting these ranks into points and adding them to the previous total and dividing by the number of years in the league plus one will give us an overall composite place that includes yearly finishes and career records. 

Here is the final tally and rankings below.

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The above chart shows some interesting facts about our teams. We notice immediately just how good Bomba and Prime Time have been against their peers. Their composite score makes them an odds on favorite to finish in the top 3/4 nearly every season. That is pretty amazing. Hartan and Jaj both rank next, each with different backgrounds. Hartan has been in the league more years, so they will get the benefit of being placed higher. Jaj has been just as good, but has done so in two less years. We have to consider that when assessing their composite 5th place finish. A few more years sample size on Jaj will make the picture clear.

Awesome and Cobra round out the teams that will consistently finish in or near the playoffs. Awesome has the lower win percentage, but has more titles than Cobra, so will be given that as a tie breaker. Cobra has managed a very strong showing in recent seasons, which has helped his cause greatly.

The bottom of the chart showcases teams that have relatively little success in the AFFL. Hangin' and Grabbers both have an average finish of 8/9th place, while Vosgee will finish near the bottom of the standings on most years. All three of these teams have made the playoffs but have rarely done much their, or much over a long period of time.

The interesting group is the middle group of HBK, Sev.i and Diddy, three teams that are sandwiched in among a 7th place composite. This essentially says that they are for the most part, fringe playoff teams, making the playoffs some seasons, and not the others. Their regular seasons can be anywhere from mediocre to good, just not exactly dominating.

Taking all this into consideration, we can now group the teams into tiers based upon the power of their teams name as it pertains to success. Just which team names pack the most punch and are associated with success the most? Find out below.

Here are the tiers for ranking the Franchises, starting from the bottom and working their way up.

The Floor (Tier 7)

Vosgee Gyank

Brand Image - Gotta learn to crawl before you can walk

There isn't much to say here. A whopping 11.5 composite score is very telling of how successful the Vosgee brand has been. Finishing on average at the bottom of the pack isn't something to celebrate. We don't know what Vosgee has to do to crawl back to the top, but victories need to come quick. They have all the makings of a great brand, just without the wins.

The Stool ( Tier 6)

Grabbers United and Hangin' and Bangin'

Brand image - Waiting for the excitement.. yup still waiting.

These two teams have had flashes of success over the years but haven't really put it together for long periods of time. Grabbers United has only recently turned the corner and made the playoffs in two of the last three seasons. The resume has one finals appearance so all is not lost. With a win in '15, they can make significant strides to move up into the next rung. We believe it is possible.

Hangin' has had a similar road as Grabbers. More playoff appearances than GU, but with less success in the postseason. Hangin' has plenty of woulda-coulda seasons, nearly winning the mazoon division one year, and failing to win playoff games the next. Their overall composite speaks to the lack of consistency at performing at a high level, rather than how bad they are. Still, there hasn't been much to get excited about with team Bangin'. We're waiting to hear it. As are they

The Swivel Chair (Tier 5)

HBK, Magnum Sev.i & BDiddy

Brand Image - Flirted with success, but always seems just out of reach.

All three teams in this tier have tasted success at different times, but have left true glory just out of reach. They have all had successful moments in the playoffs and at times had many believing they could win it all. Alas, it was not to be.

HBK had a long period of playoff-less seasons that severely hurt the teams brand. Up until recently, HBK was thought of as a pretender, a franchise that was more a paper tiger than a true lion. However, with a few fourth place finishes in the past few years, the team seems to building up momentum to jump to tier 4. They'll need to win a title under the HBK brand before they can have a seat at the head table.

Magnum Sev.i was one of only a few teams that made the finals, and only one of two that made the finals in their first season. Despite the early success, the franchise hasn't much to show in the way of success. The regular season record has sputtered down to average, and without much definition as to what exactly the franchise is all about, we are still waiting for team stache' to wow us with yearly production. The team will have to win in multiple years and not take time off.

BDiddy has been sporadic with their success. They have managed to be one of only a few teams that have finished in the top three in three consecutive seasons. Despite the top three finish, they haven't had the consistency to leave their mark on the league. They are like a water fountain that goes flat just when you are about to take a drink. We're waiting for the stream to be consistently strong year-in and year-out.

The Rocking Chair (Tier 4)

Cobra Kai & Jaj Cousteau

Brand Image - Sitting on the porch of success, about to come into the main room.

We now enter the winners lists, where the champion brands live. Two of the more recent champions have managed to crawl their way into the top half of the league.

Cobra Kai endured many years of mediocrity and finishing near the bottom only to have an evolution of sorts the last few years. With a title under their belt and a third place finish, Cobra has changed their franchises value in a short amount of time. While the team name now has "top tier" associated with it, there is still much room to improve. In order for the league and their critics to forget about the many years of hardship, the Kai would be wise to finish in the playoffs again for the third year in-a-row. If he does, he may soon be considered elite.

Jaj Cousteau is perhaps the one team that nobody likes to play. They have managed to brand their team as a winner quicker than any other team. Over the past six seasons that the team has been in the league, Cousteau has an impressive resume: A championship, four of six playoff appearances.  It's a small sample size, so we cannot give the current champ a key to the main mess hall just yet. However, there is no doubt that the name "Jaj" is now synonymous with winner.

The Living Room Recliner (Tier 3)

Hartan

Brand Image - Store front items. Really nice. Shiny. But have lost a little bit of luster.

Are these two teams elite? Well it almost seems like they should be, but they've relaxed a bit on their way to the top. Both the squads in this tier have had their fair share of success, but are here for entirely different reasons.

Hartan is the '07 AFFL champion, something that many don't really associate with the team. They have managed to slowly but surely fade into the background of the league despite being one of the few teams that can claim to be an AFFL Champion. Hartan has been consistent in all their years in the league, either consistently mediocre or consistently good. They just haven't been great for an extend long time. By great we mean winning another title. They have tasted success in the playoffs many times, but have yet win a second title to let everyone know they have arrived. They don't have the shine that the teams above them have, and their brand is one that seems to be one that is really really really good. Just not great. Plus, we have to down grade them for having two managers. It's only fair.

The Main Table (Tier 2)

Prime Time and Awesomeness.

Brand Image - Success unlike other teams, despite some blemishes.

In this tier we have two teams that have had much success over the past years, but have lost a little bit of shine along the way.

Awesomeness was once a king in the AFFL. Exploding onto the scene in '08, the team managed to tear apart both divisions on their way to three straight finals; coming away with back-to-back titles in '09-'10. Despite doing what only one other team has ever done, win two championships, the team's brand has lost its shine with horrendous finishes in three of the last four years. There is still a remembrance of the glory years when you think of Awesomeness, so the name hasn't completely evaporated into obscurity, however, if the team doesn't turn the losing seasons around, it may find those glory years to be buried in the veils of time for good.

Prime Time has been one of the most successful managers in the league. Their resume is ridiculous. The team has managed to finish in the top three in six of nine seasons. Wow. Talk about scary good. That kind of consistent winning is impossible to come by.  Thanks to their winning ways, it has almost been ingrained into the minds of others around the league that the Prime Time brand will indeed make the playoffs. However, their success is like a sundae without a cherry on top: no title makes their brand incomplete. Like an uncomfortable erection, Prime Time comes strong, but gets hurt in the end. Just one title will catapult Prime Time's brand into a tier all their own.

The Throne (Tier 1)

Atomic Bomba

Brand Image - With success comes the inevitable task of having to protect the throne. 

It is of no surprise that the top tier features a franchise that has epitomized over the past nine seasons like no other. Six of Nine seasons have found the Atomic Bomba finish in 1st or 2nd place. That is worth repeating. Over nine seasons, the Bomba has finished in the top two six times, with a back-to-back title thrown in. The teams career win percentage ranks number one, and despite not making the playoffs last season, they still carry the reminder of all the years of success very strongly. The Bomba brand is associated with winning and we don't see that changing anytime soon. Either the rest of the league will need to catch up to the four titles the Bomba brand has claimed, or their will have to be a serious drought as it pertains to winning in the coming ten years. Expect the throne to be occupied for a little longer. The real question is.. will there be company coming soon? Hmmm..