Commissioner Back! Lalazarian accepts Lifetime Barhantes pass and Zankou Thursdays to Return as Commissioner of AFFL. Frank Samian pays Co-manager $1 Fee to save Teams from 'Wrath of Ara.'

Reports said that Commissioner Lalazarian partied with AP during his week off.

After a 1.5 week hiatus, Commissioner Lalazarian accepted an extension to his contract to return as AFFL Commissioner for the next 5 years. Details of the extension emerged late Tuesday evening with reports that Lalazarian will indeed get a lifetime Barahantes pass and free Zankou on Thursdays. He will also get a prive Uber driver named Vazmig to take him to all AFFL functions. Funds for the perks will be taken out of the AFFL budget.

The move comes on the heels on yet another another controversial ploy of power by acting commissioner Ara Malikian. Malikian locked all teams from any league activity until a $1 tax for each co-manager was paid. In response to the bullying, co-managers reacted by threatening to egg Ara's house as they 'know where he lives.'  The back-and-forth went on all afternoon, until Frank Samian, head of AFFL Operations decided to put an end to the bickering.

"I don't give a shit about $4," said Samian as he cleaned up the back of his '96 newly restored Peugeot . "I'd give him double that if he'd just shut-up for a minute."

Friends close to Samian believe that the acting Commissioner had out stayed his welcome when he began throwing his weight around, forgive the pun. Those close to Samian claim the $4 fee was a way of taking power back into the league office. Malikian seemed to be enjoying his time at the top too much. Ironically, the $4 was $1 short, as Samian did not know that Tiggy is part of a tri-manager team with BDiddy. As a result, BDiddy is still locked from activities until somebody pays a buck for Tiggy. Baret and Mike are said to still be debating about paying the fee.

Still, Malikian did not run the league into the ground and did fairly well dealing with issues as they cropped up. He did manage to get Awesomeness back into the whats app chatroom after a 6 year hiatus, something Commissioner Lalazarian was unable to do. Could he serve as Commissioenr in the future? Early in the season that would be unthinkable, but now, anything is possible.

Update - AFFL Commish Extension: Lalazarian asking for Lifetime Barahantes Pass, free Zankou on Thursday; Awesomeness Comments on Whatsapp for 1st time in 6 years.

After nearly a week of Commissioner Ara at the head of the AFFL, the league is by some miracle still intact. After fining co-managers, locking out the league from making any moves, and threatening the expulsion of Vosgee Gyank owner Mardig should he finish last, Malikian broke ground on Thursday by negotiating the successful return of Awesomeness to the AFFL Whatsapp chat room.

Awesomeness owner David broke his 6 year silence with a comedic text message to the league  "Am I in the right place?" He went on  to give support for Ara as co-commissioner moving forward, though no formal vote or processing is expected. He also asked if anyone was interested in Fournette, not knowing that the trade deadline ended a week ago.

"That's what I do, I make deals," a proud Malikian said during a break from his thursday swim session. " These are the kinds of things that happen when you put me in charge. Things happen."

However, the temporary commissioner status of Ara has prompted the league to discuss the return of Lalazarian. Early Thursday morning had reports the Commissioner was in good spirits and closely monitoring the activities of the AFFL. Managers from the league had already contacted him about a return, but he refused to go so far as to give a definite date, stating only that "the time will be right when the time is right." 

Lalazarian did release a list of requests that he wishes the league to fulfill during any talks of an extension. Key requests include a "lifetime pass to all Barahentes' in Glendale," and free Zankou on Thursdays. The list also includes private use of an Uber driver to and from league events, as well as $50 yearly fee.  Owners have been said to be mulling the list.  Early reports say that the demands would be met, and Lalazarian will be back in charge of the AFFL by the playoffs. We'll keep you posted.

AFFL in Chaos: Commissioner Ara Locks Out Entire League. Charges Co-Managers $1 tax. Mardig on his way out??

Ara Tannen? Welcome to the new AFFL

In back-to-the-future 2, Marty McFly went into the future to Hill Valley, where to his surprise his whole community was being run down by gambling tycoon Biff Tanner. The dark cloud of Tannen created a society full of sex, drugs, gambling and decadence. We're not quite to the year of 2020, but the set of events may be in place in the AFFL.

In less than a week, New acting Commissioner Ara has managed to infuriate managers, put the league on lock-down, and threaten to kick out members who have been in the league for over 10 years. Looks like the future is now, and it's very dark.

On Tuesday afternoon, Commish Prime Time locked all teams from picking up players or performing any actions due to a "lack of respect" that one team showed to another. Kim Jung- Ara went on to establish clear rules for co-managers stating that there would be a $1 tax on "all co-manager teams and failure to pay the fine will result in league exemption." The "Dollars for Dumb-asses" program as Ara is calling it will help fund needy families who are living on government handouts around southern California. The league has not responded well to the new policies.

HBK manager lashed out to the policies stating that he needs to pick someone to "help him lose more respectably this week to Bomba." He went a step further to file a formal petition to play under protest should the lock-out continue.

"I don't give a rats ass who he thinks he is, he's not my commissioner," Said a heated HBK outside of his team's headquarters late Tuesday afternoon. "I'll start my own league, the WWAFFL, with only wrestling names baby."

The threats against Commissioner Ara came from all sides, including Dre and Avo, owners of Shabam Shadiq, who said they refuse to listen to anything that Ara says. They added he can kiss their Diq. No response was issued from the Commissioner office.

Vosgeee out the House?? Last place could mean just that in the new Ara era.

It is clear that the league's managers are having a gag reflex at the thought of having to swallow Ara as the acting commissioner, and the result is a mess everywhere. It's fair to wonder if the charade has gone on too long and that Lalazarian should return to take control. There have been no reports of that happening any time soon, and the league has had no communication with Lalazarian to this point.

One manager that hopes that Lalazarian returns is Vosgereechee Gyank owner Mardig, who now finds himself in the precarious position of perhaps becoming the first team to be kicked out of the league because of a last place finish. When word reached Mardig that this could happen he released the following statement: "Ara, Kakus Ger."

Will Ara kick Mardig out? How long will he tolerate the co-manager teams? Does he even sleep anymore or does he just think about ways of killing managers all night? It's a crazy time in the AFFL and there seems to be no light at the end of the tunnel.

In short, the league's feelings are captured in Biff Tannen's infamous quote:

Hey Ara, "why don't you make like a tree and get outta here."

Ara-FFL? Prime Time Owner New Acting Commissioner. Lala Goes MIA after Accusations of Unethical Behavior

The AFFL Trade deadline is on Friday, and it looks like the League may have swapped something else besides players.

In a shocking twist, long-time commissioner Lalazarian has gone MIA after accusations by league managers of unethical behaviors. In his absence, Frank Samian, head of AFFL operations has sworn in Prime Time league owner Ara Malikian to take over all league activities and decision making.

11.08.17... when the AFFL changed forever

"Well if I weren't a blind son-of-bitch, we don't know where the commish went," said a disgruntled and worn down Samian outside AFFL HQ early Thursday morning. "With the deadline approaching, we needed someone to approve trades, can't just have a fart in the wind sitting in the head chair. Ara was the logical choice."

During a conversation with league managers Sayyad and Harout over a possible changing of the trade deadline date, the Commissioner shot down any notion that the possibility of a trade would even be up for a vote. To this, manager of Cobra Kai went over the Commissioner's head and decided to conduct a vote anyway, prompting the commissioner to lash out in anger and ultimately leave the league entirely.

A video published early Thursday morning was released that showed the Commissioner in some sort of Vietnamese prison or Burmese half-way house giving his endorsement to Prime Time as the new acting commissioner. In the video, the Commissioner warns the league that they got what they had hoped for, and things would be very different now.

As for Prime Time, this is a sort of coup-de-gratis for him. He has long dreamed of taking over the AFFL and now has the chance to unleash his power on the rest of the 12 managers. We can only imagine what is to come. With Malikian no manager is safe, or should I say, no co-manager is safe.  This saga isn't over. Stay tuned.

AFFL Exclusive: Sabatoge. Betrayal. Corruption. Uncovering the Darkside Of Co-Managers

9am Sunday Morning. The sounds of birds chirping give call to another Fantasy game day. Inside the Shabam HQ, Dre rises, splashes some water on his face, pours his morning coffee, and checks the inactives. His phone has 12 missed calls and 14 text messages from co-manager Avo. He brushes it aside for the time being and goes on with his routine.

Click. TV. The morning talking heads give their advice on who to start in this weeks line-up. Dre calmly places his laptop on his boxer briefs, pops the top, and gets to work. Sunday, the Fantasy Gods don't rest.

9:15am Sunday morning. Avo has 4 computer screens open, each with a different fantasy pundit giving their advice. The question in his mind, "Start Landry or Cooper Kupp?" 20 different post-it notes, each with different statistical facts to the question at hand, are pasted around the house,  revealing the trail that Avo has woven over the past 45 minutes. Avo grabs his phone. Still no response from Dre. Typical, he thinks. Dre is probably still asleep.

9:27 am Sunday Morning. Dre gets a text. Cooper Kupp or Landry Mayret Koonem wake-up?!! Dre doesn't appreciate the Armenian greeting. He puts down the coffee, and replies, "Landry" He adjusts his glasses and continues his morning twitter stroll.

9:28 am Sunday Morning. Avo's phone dies. He's been on it since 7:30, watching Australian rules football. He plugs it in to charge. Still unsure of who to start, Avo ventures to the computer for more research.

9:45am Sunday Morning. Dre takes a magazine and goes into the "office." He won't be out until at least 9:50.

9:51 am. Sunday Morning. Avo panics. He knows Kupp is just a rookie, but he has a feeling. A feeling that only the Black Eyed Peas and few others have ever known about. Avo decides that Dre is holding him back. He takes matters into his own hands.

10:01 am. Sunday Morning. Rosters are locked. Dre meets his wife for breakfast, and they enjoy some Eggs and toast. He does not know about the switch.

10:10 am. Sunday Morning. Dre picks up his phone to see that Kupp is in the starting roster. He texts Avo. "Why did you switch Landry?" Avo replies, "I had a feeling."

9:30 pm Sunday Evening. Dre and Avo lose by 5 points. Kupp scores 5.2. Landry 13.20. They would've won.

The world of co-managing is ruthless. Relying on two brains to make one decision, when one of those brains are seemingly "unlucky" can be ruthless. While many believe the world of the co-manager is one with "more input" leading to better decisions, it is often times one that is marred with backstabbing and sabatoge. Did Avo take offense to Dre ignoring his texts? Was this a deliberate attack to establish power? It very well could have been.

Co-managers from different teams usually never walk behind each other. A rare photo.

Psychologist Dr. Varmik Tsutseesik (prounounced Tsuh-tsee-tseek) finds that when making decisions on who to start, "the interpersonal relationship comes to play and can often times be manifested in subconscious acts of aggression against the other in the form of purposeful neglect."

There have been a few obvious signs of sabotage in the AFFL, most recently during week 2 of this season, when BDiddy managers inexplicably started Eli manning over Matthew Stafford. The move was justified by BDiddy manager Baret by saying they felt Manning would have "a 6 touchdown game similar to one he had years ago." However, the AFFL courier has uncovered that that quote was told to Baret by Tiggy, and was part of a 2 hour conversation where the 3rd leg of the trans-manager team convinced Baret and Mikey that Eli was going to "blow-up." Was this a way of Tiggy getting back at the other two managers for his small cut of the BDiddy franchise? Dr. Varmik thinkso.

"You could not tell me that Eli over Stafford was done with good intentions," he said. "That's a losing move, and the fact that Tiggy sold it just underlines the animosity he must feel by being almost let go for a $50 co-manager fee."

While Sabotage seems to be the theme of the above examples, there have been other incidents of Betrayl, namely in the Hartan camp.

A co-managers mind is always plotting.. but for what??

In 2010, Vartan called Harout about a trade proposed to them by Dre and Avo week 3: Jason Witten for Marques Colston. Vartan wanted to ship Witten since he was a cowboys player. Harout did not want Colston and put his foot down that Witten was worth the hold. Vartan went ahead and pulled the deal despite Harout's wishes.

Fast forward to week 11 of that same season. With the trade deadline approaching, and still upset about the state of the team since the Witten trade, Harout secretly works a backdoor deal with Cobra kai, sending Jamaal Charles and the despised Marques Colston for Drew Brees and Pierre Thomas. Vartan finds out about the trade a day later in an AFFL news break without Harout mentioning a word. When he finally asked Harout what happened? Harout just responded "Witten."

Many will say that this is all hearsay, that there is really no proof of infighting between managers. Experts would like to think that, but could anyone honestly look at the Magnum Sev.i draft results and not think they weren't trying take one another down during the live auction draft?  $39 for Ty Hilton with Luck hurt? An Rb and WR tandem from the Colts and Broncos?  I mean WTF?

Magnum Sev.i bid against themselves for Ty for $39. And Luck was injured.

They say two wrongs don't make a right. This couldn't me more true in the case of co-managing. A vehement opponent of co-managers, Ara Malikian, recently turned the AFFL world upside down when he announced that he would have a co-manager for this season. His co-manager turned out to be his little baby girl Datev, who was introduced to the league in an adorable video talking smack to the league. Now with the official title of co-manager, could she be the next person to sabatoge team Prime Time? If Ara leaves his laptop open, would she dare crawl across the keyboard, give the mouse pad a few taps, and hope that she accidentally proposes a trade to Vosgee: Kareem Hunt for Jeremy Maclin. Would Vosgee even accept?

The world of co-managers is a dark one, filled with emotional riffs, grudges and payback when things aren't going right. Is it surprising that all the co-managing teams currently have losing records and are placed 7-10? No. What is surprising that nobody that is a bi-manager has ended up in the hospital. yet. For the sake of the AFFL insurance policy, we hope it stays that way.