Hangin' & Bangin' Claims Prime Time using Voodoo Doll to Injure Lynch

View fullsize

Hangin' & Bangin' has filed tampering chargers with the league claiming that Prime Time owner Ara has attempted to use a voodoo doll in order to try and injure their star running back Marshawn Lynch. Doesn't he know "beast mode" thrives on that voodooo s***?!

In the claim, managers Avo and Andre say that during the course of the past two days, they have found evidence of pins and Seattle Seahawk dolls laying around Prime Time's residence all with Lynch's number on them. Along with the pins, a letter addressed to Hangin' & Bangin' was photographed that began with the sentence, "Dear Hangin' & Kaking, please go f*** yourselves." Ara's despise of co-managers has been well documented, and this further supports that claim. 

View fullsize

Is this the way Ara plans to try and prohibit Larry Fitzgerald from having a big statistical day?

It has been widely known that Hangin' and Bangin; has an extensive pre-game ritual that involves rubbing rabbits feet, kissing four leaf clovers, and dancing around in a circle while hoping on one leg to help garnish wins. With a strong belief in the AFFL karma that helps generate victories for managers, Dre and Avo were prime targets for Ara's Voodoo experiment.

Ara claims that the accusations are false and that he actually collects dolls for a hobby. And for those pins? They belong to his wife Taleen, as she has recently tried to get into designing dresses as a side job. After purchasing too many, she needed a few more cushions, and used Ara's dolls, but not with the intent of trying to maim Lynch.

"Why can't a man of thirty years have a doll collection without everyone getting suspicious about it," shouted Ara during a conference call Wed. afternoon. "What I do with my dolls and my pins is my business. Those co--managers need to stop blaming other managers for their ineffectiveness mayra kunem."

Late Wednesday afternoon, AFFL President of Operations Frank Samian released a statement that there have been no charges filed against Prime Time for "tactics conducted that are detrimental to the league," and while pictures and dolls are nice pieces to a puzzle, Samian claims that all evidence to this point has been entirely circumstantial. There is a high likelyhood that Ara does indeed have his own doll collection. 

The AFFL Karma is very vital to a teams success, and approaching the draft, all teams are trying to get the most of it. Commissioner Lalazarian has drawn a very clear line in the sand when it comes to using the supernatural as a means to throw shade on another team.

“I'll allow the jinx, and that's it,” said Lalazarian. “We're not in the hexing business.”

View fullsize

Found under Ara's bed. He's 33 years old.

Investigators will continue to search Prime Time headquarters for possible Ouija boards on Thursday, but don't expect to find much of anything, except more dolls. A few barbies and a Teddy Ruxpin were found Wednesday evening under Ara's bed.

One thing is for certain, with the new year approaching, and the ongoing displeasure that Ara has expressed about teams that use two managers to function, the Prime Time vs. Hangin' and Bangin' rivalry has new life, or should we say, risen from the dead.

Director Tommy Wiseau Set to Make AFFL Documentary Using Stop-Motion Animation

View fullsize

"Oh hai, AFFL."

After writing, directing, and starring in the cult movie classicThe Room, Tommy Wiseau is bringing his unparalleled talents to fantasy football, where he will film a documentary about the 2014 AFFL season using stop-motion animation, a league source said Monday.

“We hope to work closely with Wiseau films to capture the beauty of the league in its entirety,” said Commissioner Lalazarian as he stood alongside the long-haired Wiseau outside of league headquarters. “It goes without saying that a Wiseau movie is one-of-a-kind, and that's what our league is all about."

Wiseau himself is excited about the opportunity to work in the AFFL, as he is an avid football fan. “In my movies, I always, ALWAYS try to capture the essence of football. When I'm shooting, I think to myself, 'Okay. How can we get a football in there, to bring more drama to the scene? I think football is a great game, and I like it a lot.”

The Room has developed a national following for all the wrong reasons. Fans of the film are usually at a loss of words on just how to describe its plot and claim that the film has to be experienced to be understood. Excited movie goers at midnight screenings around the country create a unique viewing experience by throwing spoons at the screen and shouting infamous lines as they are said. There is nothing like it.

View fullsize

Wiseau sees himself as a cinematic innovator in the film world. and has said he would be filming every fantasy week with 3 different cameras, in 6 different formats: Digital, 35mm film, 3-D, 4-D (his own creation he claims), 5-D(once you understand 4-D, 5-D is a piece of cake. “you get the picture.”) and Home Video. Each format will be used to create a unique stop-motion animation that he will then reinterpret and bring back to life. Wiseau claims that it will be the first time in cinematic history that someone will go from film, to animation, then back to film.

Will the documentary have its share of classic Room fixtures, such as framed spoons, warm alcohol, and footballs being played in tuxedos? The AFFL should be so lucky. Tommy has reportedly already asked permission to incorporate shots of the San Francisco Golden Gate Bridge into the opening credits. It has begun.

One thing is for sure, league managers and Wiseau fans alike can surely be shouting the same line come the middle of the season. "You're tearing me apart Ara!"

If you need a little update on the Room, enjoy the clips below and buckle up for the best documentary in years. It doesn't get worse.... err... better than this.

The wonderfully horrible rooftop scene. Cinematic gold.

Hye 5: Five Undervalued Players at the QB position

View fullsize

In two weeks time, there won't be anything more to do. All the analyzing, number crunching, agonizing, and indecision will finally cease and give way to a new thirteen week adventure where you can cuss out the TV screen, cuss out your friends, and have a great time stressing over fantasy football every Sunday. It's fantastic!

Over the next two weeks, the "Hye 5" articles will examine which players at the position we feel are undervalued according to where they are being drafted, starting with the quarterback position, then moving on to wide receiver/tight end and running back.  After all, a fantasy football draft is not only about the player you pick, it's about when you can pick him.  Things change all the time in fantasy, and so will players values over the next two weeks, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't start somewhere.

Quarterbacks are kings in the NFL, so you can bet they are the same in Fantasy. Experts everywhere laud that managers should wait on a quarterback, and I don't disagree with that stance. However, that doesn't mean that you should wait until the twelfth round either. When it comes to drafting a signal caller, you focus on the players skill set as well as the situation he finds himself in. Ideally, you want a pass-happy offense coupled with a quarterback with a great skill set. Does the signal caller have a stud WR to throw to? How is the receiving core? Some go so far as to look at the teams defense to determine if they will be in shootouts. I think this is a bit premature.  If the Seahawks are playing the Cowboys, it doesn't matter that the Cowboys defense might be shaky. Do you really think that Romo is gonna put up huge numbers versus that defense? I didn't think so. 

The above criteria is obviously why Manning, Brees, and Rodgers are the first three off the board. While they are the creme de la creme of the quarterback position, that doesn't meant there aren't more that can offer you just as much fantasy production on a given week. Here are five quarterbacks that can be had somewhere after the second round that will offer just as much of a chance for a great year at a discount value.

1.  Andrew Luck

Current ADP: Mid-5th round

Rank should be: Late 3rd/Early 4th

View fullsize

A fifth round quarterback doesn't seem like it would be that great of value, unless you say that Luck could finish as one of the top three quarterbacks in fantasy. Yes, you heard that correctly. I think that Luck will finish in the top three, and wouldn't be surprised if he ends the year as #1. Bold statements need backup, so here's mine.

First lets consider the other players that have the same potential. Peyton Manning is obviously the favorite to land that honor, but he has a host of things against him. One, he is a year older and lost his redzone weapon in Decker. Two, Denver was trying to get Manning the record last year, and this year, with an improved defense, may opt to rest Manning a bit more in preparation for the postseason. I think Manning's numbers drop enough to make him vulnerable at the top.

Sean Peyton has already said that they are going to try to balance the offense a bit more, which means more running. Sure he'll get numbers, but the balanced attack will eat away at his upside just a tad. Secondly, if you look at Drew Brees's numbers in the second half of the season last year, you'll notice a significant drop off in production. In the final 8 games of the season including playoffs, Brees had only 3 multi-touchdown games. Brees was nicked up and that had something to do with it, but It's no coincidence that his drop off coincided with injury to Jimmy Graham as well. One nick to Graham, and his numbers could come down significantly again.

Lastly, Aaron Rodgers. I'll admit, Rodgers is in my eyes the strongest candidate to finish the year at number one, but he isn't full proof to downside either. Did we forget that Jordy Nelson is himself really injury prone, and with out James Jones and Jermichael Finely, should Nelson be out for an extended time, who becomes the redzone target?

Andrew Luck has a few things going for him that are positives when it comes to fantasy quarterbacks. Hakeem Nicks was added to the roster (yes he may be slow and old, but in the redzone he can still produce). His receiving core is fully healthy, including the return of Dwayne Allen another redzone target and rookie speedster Donte Moncrief. Looking at his numbers, he is entering his third season, a year when the majority of big signal callers had a jump in production (Brees went from years with 11 and 17 tds thrown to 27 in his 3rd year). Last season, Luck threw for 3800 yards with 23 Tds and 7 Ints, adding 377 rushing yards and 4 rush Tds. With the return of Allen, addition of Nicks, and a healthy Reggie Wayne, TY Hilton, and the rest of the bunch, it just seems unlikely that Luck's numbers will regress or stay flat.  Couple that with the fact that the Colts don't have much of a running game. They won't be able to run the clock out in games and will rely on Luck more to keep the game in hand. An increase in production seems set, and I wouldn't be surprised if we see a 10 touchdown one at that. He's going as the 5th rated QB off the board, which is fine for whoever drafts him. He'll finish better than that. Bank on it.

Drafted with expectations of: 3500+ yrds, 20-25 tds, 300+ rush yrds, 5 tds.
Should finish with: 4400+ yrds, 30+ tds, 300 rush yrds 5 tds.

2. Matt Ryan

Current ADP: Late 7th Round

Rank should be: Late 5th Round

View fullsize

If Andrew Luck getting Wayne back from injury was a boost, then Julio Jones must be rocket fuel for Ryan. Do we forget that Matt Ryan is only one year removed from finishing in the top 5 amongst fantasy quarterbacks? Now I do admit that losing Tony G is going to take some wind out of the "good ship Ryan-pop's" sails, but that shouldn't be anything that Julio Jones can't make up for. What is more important is that the Falcons are reportedly going to operate out of a three-wide set as their base, highlighting their strong WR core and pass catching running backs. If that doesn't set the table for a big year for Ryan, I don't know what will. Having three wide receivers at his disposal, Matty Ice will have ample opportunity to return to his 2012 form despite the loss of Tony G. It's also worth noting that Steven Jackson is a year older and the falcons know this. Drafting Devonta Freeman was a move that showcased the coaching staffs desire to open up the offense and throw it around a little more. They won't be able to be affect with Steven Jackson taking the bulk of the focus.

In 2012, Matty Ice finished the year with 4700 yards passing and a 32/14 td/int ratio. There is no reason to thing that those yardage totals aren't possible with a trio like Julio, Roddy, and Douglas. Tony G had eight touchdowns that year, and I don't think it would be far fetched to say that number couldn't be split between Julio, Roddy, and Douglas. Matt Ryan is top 5 Qb potential at a late mid-round price. Call the police. This is stealing.

Drafted with expectations of: 3900+ yrds, 27 tds,
Should finish with: 4500+ yrds, 30+tds

3.  Tony Romo

Current ADP: Early 9th round

Rank Should be: Mid-7th round

View fullsize

Stop me if you've heard this before. Tony Romo is an overrated quarterback. Please, keep saying that. It helps drive his value through the floor. So let me get this straight. I get a Qb who has a stud WR, stud TE, solid WR core, great offensive line, pass-catching solid running backs, and plays in a dome, all for a 9th round price? Did someone get fired for this? Every year seems to be the year to "defend Tony Romo," and this one seems no different. He's got a horrible stigma attached to his name that he can't shake as a real NFL quarterback, but how that has infested the fantasy universe is beyond me. There are no glaring reasons why Romo can't have as big a year as any other quarterback drafted above him, except for that little nasty stigma that he can't shake. Romo threw for 4900 yrds and 28/19 tds/ints in 2012 (finishing 8th) and 3800 31/10 last year (good for 8th again). His ceiling seems to be right around there, unless you consider a few other factors. The cowboys have had a rotation of wide receivers at the second WR spot since 2011, when Miles Austin started to fall off the map. Terrence Williams has a strong hold on that spot in 2014 and reports are he has looked good. With a more consistent core, Romo should feel more comfortable in the pocket.

But the biggest boost is perhaps the signing of Scott Linehan, the ex-Detriot Lions offensive coordinator. Compare the Cowboys personnel to the ones the lions had and you may find its very similar, if not slightly tilted in the Cowboys favor. Mega and Dez are studs. Witten is better than any tight end Stafford had. Terrence Williams should be as good if not better than Titus Young, Broyles or anyone else threw out along side Calvin. Lastly, Demarco Murray is much more of a complete back than Reggie Bush. With the glowing parts ready to use at his disposal, Linehan will give Romo the one thing that he hasn't had yet in his career, a stable, reliable, innovative play caller that he can trust. In years past, the Cowboys have passed that duty back and forth from coach to coordinator back to coach. Putting Romo at ease will lead to one of his best seasons yet.

Drafted with expectations of: 3300+ yrds, 25 tds,
Should finish with: 4800+ yrds, 30+ tds,

4. Colin Kaepernick

Current ADP: Late 9th

Rank should be: Mid-7th

View fullsize

When a quarterback gets a 1,000 yard receiver back to full health, and then gets another 1,000 yard receiver via trade, and adds them to a roster that has an already reliable wide out and tight end who creates mismatches, what happens? Answer: everything you can think of. The quarterback from "Tattooine" is primed for a huge year, thanks to the addition of Stevie Johnson and the return of Michael Crabtree. Kap spent most of last season throwing to guys who were third and fourth tier wide receivers. Fullback Bruce Miller was the teams third leading receiver. I think I will repeat that because that bears repeating. Bruce Miller, the stocky blocker out of the back field was the teams third leading receiver. Oh, and he's back too from injury this year. Hallelujah! It's a minor miracle that Kaepernick threw for 3100 yards and 21 tds.

On top of the loss of half his receiving core, Kaepernick played in pain, admitting that he suffered  chipped bone in his foot during the week 2 game against the Seahawks. Not being able to plant your foot and throw comfortably will affect any quarterbacks trajectory and location. We can expect his 58% completion rate to rise this year as a combined result of being healed and having a full arsenal of wide outs to his disposal. The Niners didn't trade for Stevie Johnson to watch him block and stand on the sidelines. Expect Kap and co. to be in more three wide sets, looking to create one-on-one mismatches for Vernon, Crab and Stevie. Spreading the field will also allow Kap more room to roam, and I would not be the least surprised if his rushing numbers rose as a result. The Niners know this year is the year they must win it all, so I would expect them to pull out all the stops, unleashing Kaepernick in any way they can.

Drafted with expectations of: 3200+ yrds, 20 tds, 400+ rush yrds, 5 tds.
Should finish with: 3800+ yrds, 25+ tds, 500 rush yrds, 7 tds.

5. Ben Roethlisberger

Current ADP:  Late 11th Round

Rank Should Be: Mid-8th Round

View fullsize

He's not the most flashy fantasy quarterback name on the board. He won't have many  5 touchdown games, or throw for 400 yards too often (though he did that twice last year) however, Big Ben is as reliable as they come. Finishing in the top ten in 2013, he is a late round pick that is great upside. Last season, Ben throw for more attempts than any in his career, 584. With an emphasis on running a "no-huddle" offense to maximize the number of plays run a game, those numbers should remain where they are. The Steelers have a great WR group, lead by Antonio Brown, a fast twitch player that excels in the open field. Roethlisberger also gets the addition of a developed Marcus Wheaton, who had a fine preseason game against the bills. With LeVon Bell able to catch passes out of the backfield, the Steelers are going to push tempo and put the ball in Big Ben's hands. That is a recipe for success in the fantasy world, especially when it is handed to a reliable quarterback that has a history of top five fantasy finishes.

Owners who miss-out on the above quarterbacks can look to nab Ben after the 8th round and pair him with another late Qb in hopes of playing match-ups and striking fantasy gold. While I don't expect Ben to leapfrog everyone and finish the year in the top-five, he will more than likely finish in the top ten, with a few huge games during the year that will be all the difference for a manager who invested a pick for him. Expect an improvement on last years stat line of 4200 28/14. In Todd Haley we trust.

Drafted with expectations of:  3800 yrds, 24 tds.
Should finish with: 4300+ yrds, 30+ tds,

5 Things You Shouldn't Do Prior and During a Fantasy Football Draft

View fullsize

Every fantasy football website will tell you all the things you should do before your draft. They'll post rankings, podcasts, discuss players, and give you every single bit of strategy to help you succeed at picking the best team possible. There is only one problem. When it comes to the actual draft, you find that all that prep work pretty much goes out the window, as nobody in your league drafts as they are suppose to. Aaron Rodgers had been going at the end of the 2nd round in all your mock drafts, and all of a sudden he's gone at pick 13? Why did Ap go ahead of Jamaal Charles and Lesean McCoy? Why isn't anyone drafting Terrance West? What the heck is going on?!!

You'll find that a fantasy draft is more an adventure in improvisation than one in detailed preparedness.  That isn't to say that you shouldn't target players and have plans, but there is a lot more that should be done, or not done, than just printing out a cheat sheet and relying on experts to tell you who to pick.

What goes without being mentioned are the many things that you should not do in a fantasy draft. No, I'm not talking about "Don't take a kicker until the last round sort of stuff," although that is part of it (and please don't). I'm talking about the actual nuts and bolts of preparing for a draft. Many managers engage in activities prior and during a draft that hinders their chances at drafting a great team. It's the little things in life that are important and sometimes not doing everything you can actually turns out to be a good thing.

So here are five bits of advice for the fantasy manager as to things they shouldn't do prior to or during a fantasy draft. The in-draft strategies are centered around snake drafting. You may not agree with them, but coming from a fantasy vet, these are things that I believe, if not done properly, will give a manager an edge come draft day.

1. Do not follow an experts advice, especially one that gets paid for it.

View fullsize

Get off the grid. Yes, the grid. It's the imaginary fantasy vortex that all managers live in prior to the draft. You know it well. It's made up of cheat sheets from every expert on the planet, cut together to form the total number of possibilities that every one in your league is following during the draft. Every manager in your league is more than likely following the guidelines of some expert on some website somewhere. After all, they are getting paid for their advice, they must know something right. Wrong. They know no more than you do. They watch the same preseason games and can come to the same conclusions as you. You are privy to the same information they are. Even the best experts have an accuracy percentage rate of around 57%. 57%! That's just better than a coin flip. Why bother putting your entire season in the hands of someone who is just better than a coin flip? After all, you'll hear every one of these experts say at some point, "Ya I missed that pick," as casually as possible, while you are cursing the day you drafted Cj Spiller in the first round on their advice. We've all been there.

But the biggest reason not to follow an experts advice is so that you hone your own instincts. Fantasy football is about trusting your gut. You need to know what is the best decision that YOU made, so that during the season, that little intuition that was right (or wrong) on draft day could be used again when it's time to make a roster choice. If you allow an expert to essentially pick your team for you, you're missing out on a huge opportunity to do what you feel is best and gain some valuable experience in the process. It's better to go down with choices you made, than choices someone else made for you, isn't it?

Lastly, the best thing about getting off the "grid" is that you can use it to your advantage. Why was AP taken #1 overall and Terrance West not drafted? Because someone probably followed an experts rankings to do so. Knowing this gives a huge advantage to you. You can see certain managers draft according to popular rankings from popular sites, and you can use that to your advantage. One league I was in had many of the managers using ESPN and Matthew Berry's rankings during the draft. Knowing this, I was better able to predict who would be selected when, and saw how the draft was unfolding thanks in large part to that. Needless to say, I finished second that  year.

So while experts are great to listen to, and accumulate information from, do not follow anyone explicitly. In fact, discard all that information and make your own rankings up, and be keen on how other people are drafting during the draft. Use what you know against your league. All is fair in love and fantasy football.

2. Don't Stick to a Draft Plan.

View fullsize

Yes. That's right. Don't plan on anything. Well, okay, that may be a bit too extreme. It's always good to have a plan entering a draft, but we all know how those plans work out. The draft is fluid, and full of surprises. The teams that are able to maneuver through those surprises effortlessly are the ones that build the best teams. Just like a real NFL draft, a fantasy draft takes on a life of its own, and you have to be ready to ride the wave as it is forming.

Many managers make the mistake of having plans that they wish to carry out during draft day and stick to the plan religiously. They've mock drafted hundreds of times and determined that the best spot for them to take a second RB is rounds 4 and 5. Lo and behold, when it's their turn in the fourth round there is a wide receiver that slipped and is sitting to be taken. Never in a mock draft did the board in the 4th round have this player available. Taking him would mean altering their strategy. Instead of doing that, they pass on the player and stick to taking a running back. I've heard co-managers say "let's stick to the plan" many times. While a manager won't know the results until the end of the season, this is a situation that could comeback to haunt them. 

This exact situation happened last year to my team in the AFFL, where Reggie Bush was available in the 3rd round. He had never been available in any mock draft I had done before, but there he was. The plan was to take a WR, but that quickly changed. The WR was Roddy White. Bush ended up having a huge year, while White got hurt. Had I stuck to the plan, I wouldn't have been as successful as I could of been. Be fluid. Expect to do something unexpected.

Yes you should target players, but don't be so married to your plan that you cannot deviate from it. Chances are that you will be given the opportunity to at some point in the draft, and whether or not you choose to could determine how successful you are. Mock drafts aren't the way to measure how a draft will go. They won't go that way come draft day, so be ready to throw caution into the wind and draft with reckless abandon. The draft will be more fun and chances are your team will be better for it. Which leads me to point three..

3. Do not be afraid to make a risky pick, even if you have to reach.

View fullsize

Why has reaching become such a bad term? Everyone says that when someone reaches for a player, it was a bad pick? Your draft board says that in the third round, Victor Cruz, Larry FItzgerald, and others are available, as usual. Experts have lauded that at this spot you should take one of the stud WRs, but your gut tells you that  to pick that rookie running back that is suppose to go in round four. If you have followed the above protocol, you will have given yourself the freedom to make this move. This example was an actual example that happened in the AFFL, where HBK was faced with going with the safe pick at WR, or drafting a rookie in Eddie Lacy at the top of the 3rd round. No expert or draft strategy was promoting Lacy that early. Needless to say, Lacy turned out to be a great pick, and well worth the "reach" on investment.

The teams that are most successful minimize risk in their drafting by loading up on positions where they take the most risk. If you are contemplating taking a player that you are not sure about, you shouldn't discard taking him for that reason, but rather make sure you have enough good players around him at the same position to help offset a possible bust. Winning the fantasy football championship means that you cannot play it safe, and that means taking guys when everyone said not to. The year Arian Foster broke out, Jaj took him in the second round. No expert had him going there. By all accounts it was a reach. Turned out to be a winning move. Risking a pick, or reaching on  a player because you like him is just fine. Don't be afraid to do it.

4. Do not forget to track positions of picks of other drafters, especially those behind you.

You have the 9th pick in the 6th round. You are debating between Jason Witten at Tight End and a Wide Receiver. You would love to have them both. You decide to draft Witten first and hope that the WR makes it back to you. Unfortunately the team right behind you snatches the wide receiver you wanted. Oh well, wasn't meant to be. Only you didn't bother to look at what picks 10, 11, and 12 had done before selecting Witten. Had you taken a peak, you would have noticed that they had tight ends, and weren't going to draft one there. You could have gotten the wide receiver there and waited and gotten Witten on the whip. The little things are always big.

Paying attention to what other teams have drafted is huge, and so many managers lose out on players they want because they fail to follow what the league is doing by position. When drafting a quarterback, it's imperative that you follow how many have been taken and which teams have them. If you're in the middle of the draft order, you'll better gauge the likely hood that a quarterback comes back to you in this round or not depending on the number of teams that might select a quarterback due to need. Smart owners will always target the player they want, then look around them to see whether they should take them at that moment or perhaps wait and predict out what teams around them will do. You can't do this enough. If a team near you has three running backs in their first three picks, and you are contemplating a few RBs, don't take the RB first, take something else, as surely one of the guys you like will be available on the way back to you.

This is important for teams drafting at the ends of the snake, but is useful everywhere. If you want to maximize your selections, knowing what order to pick certain positions you're debating between based on what other teams have done is a winning strategy. Don't get lazy. Keep tabs on everyone.

5. Do not Draft 2 Elite Quarterbacks in the first few rounds in hopes of trading one.

View fullsize

This has happened twice in the AFFL and both times by the same manager with dire consequences. You need a top tier quarterback to win the title, but good luck trying to trade one to a league of managers that knows you have to. Chances are that by selecting two elite quarterbacks in the early rounds you are missing out on wide receivers and running backs that will help your team immediately, rather than a player that will sit on your bench for five weeks until a team gets desperate. Wins are too important in a thirteen week season to throw them away, and you are increasing the likely hood that that happens by passing up on starters for a trade option. Unless you think that you can nab top ten talent in rounds 8-13, you're going to be putting your team in a huge hole to begin the year. Is it really worth it?

Aside the fact that you miss out on elite starters, you are drafting a position that is extremely deep. Last season, Nick Foles, Andy Dalton, Big Ben and others finished the season as top twelve quarterbacks, and were more than likely available off the waiver wire. Teams who are wise will opt to just take their chances off the waiver than trade one of their elite players for one of your quarterbacks. You may eventually find a trade partner, but the cost will be for much less than say the third round pick you gave for the quarterback.  Don't do it. It sounds good in theory, but it ends up being a move that puts your team in a huge hole for weeks on end.

So there it is, five little reminders for you to take with you into your fantasy draft. Just remember, things will not going according to plan, and no expert is going to tell you the perfect pick when your up to select. Just sit back, trust your gut and let loose. The only decision you can make that won't be a right one will be doing what everyone else is doing. And with 11 out of ever 12 teams not winning the title every year, do you really think that's a wise strategy? Go forth young man. Draft with confidence. You got this.

Hartan Mock Drafts 457 times in One Hour, Passes out, Speaks to Fantasy Gods.

View fullsize

This time of year calls for fantasy football managers to be diligent and practice drafting on mock draft sites like yahoo or fantasyfootballcalculator.com, in order to hone their skills for when their real draft comes. Some mock draft once or twice a day. Others may do it in bunches for hours on end. Hartan did it until his Iphone exploded.

Donning a blue mask and claiming to be a Superhero named Varout, Hartan awoke from a momentary lapse in consciousness late Thursday evening with fried Iphone in hand to have completed 457 mock drafts in one hour, most certainly a world record. That equates to roughly 7 mock drafts per second, which means he must have had amazing cellphone service. Four major mobile carriers have already come out and claimed that Hartan is on their companies plan. Still, the question remains, how the heck did he do it?

Donning his "Mock Fantasy Mask," Hartan mock drafts as his Superhero alter ego.. Varout.

"I basically had more than twenty-five mock draft windows open at one time," Hartan said to reporters after he was found passed out on the sidewalk near his workplace in west la. "I would draft, click, draft, click, draft, click. Before I knew it, I was borrowing other people's Iphones and drafting on theirs. It was pretty intense."

Hartan had five Iphones, two laptops, and a palm pro of all things, all belonging to strangers who had gathered around the AFFL manager to egg him on as he went for a record. During the spontaneous mock draft marathon, strangers brought beers and funneled it down Hartan's throat so as he would not miss a millisecond of any draft. After just over an hour of drafting, the Iphone in his hand exploded, sending Hartan to the ground unconscious. That's when things got deeper than this years crop of wide receivers.

View fullsize

Once Hartan came too, he proclaimed to have seen the fantasy gods and had a conversation with them. He described the gods as "donning three helmets, gold, silver, bronze, and a uniform that had ever NFL teams logo and colors embroidered into it."  He added that they spoke to him in numbers, numbers he understood, similar to the draft system that he had been using for years.

"I realized then that all these years, our draft system was actually channeling the Fantasy Gods. That's what they told me. They told me 'two is greater than seven, unless you go five.' It made perfect sense."

Harout's Mock drafting Super Outfit: "The Ninja Lantern.' Look for him in draft rooms today.

Medical examiners will continue to keep an eye on Hartan over the next week and he has been instructed not to mock draft for at least seven days. With the AFFL draft fast approaching on the 29th, Hartan can't afford to skip mocking during the most important time of the preseason, when teams values rise on a whim. He may need a new Iphone to do so, but look for Hartan to defy doctors orders and mock like hell over these next two weeks. Nothing is more important than the AFFL draft right now, and all eyes will be on Hartan and his number system come August 29th. Not only eyes, but apparently the tongue's of the fantasy gods as well.